Retreat Centers
Retreat Centers
I'm sure this has been asked a million times before, sorrry, but is there an age limit or similar rules and limitation to moving and living at a retreat center? Is it a possiblilty once one is past age 65 to move to one?
- bryandavis
- Posts: 374
- Joined: Sat Oct 06, 2012 2:47 pm
Re: Retreat Centers
It will be dependent upon the rules of the dharma center that has the retreat facilities available.
Re: Retreat Centers
oh, I guess I meant Dharma center. Do you know of any "typical" rules in this regard?bryandavis wrote: ↑Tue May 28, 2019 3:36 pm It will be dependent upon the rules of the dharma center that has the retreat facilities available.
Re: Retreat Centers
You have to work a lot, as far as I have seen the situation isn't ideal for older people at this point.TharpaChodron wrote: ↑Tue May 28, 2019 3:47 pmoh, I guess I meant Dharma center. Do you know of any "typical" rules in this regard?bryandavis wrote: ↑Tue May 28, 2019 3:36 pm It will be dependent upon the rules of the dharma center that has the retreat facilities available.
/magnus
"We are all here to help each other go through this thing, whatever it is."
~Kurt Vonnegut
"The principal practice is Guruyoga. But we need to understand that any secondary practice combined with Guruyoga becomes a principal practice." ChNNR (Teachings on Thun and Ganapuja)
~Kurt Vonnegut
"The principal practice is Guruyoga. But we need to understand that any secondary practice combined with Guruyoga becomes a principal practice." ChNNR (Teachings on Thun and Ganapuja)
Re: Retreat Centers
In theory seems a great idea, in practice not always. Dharma centres can be very busy places with as Magnus says above lots of work/ help needed.
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Re: Retreat Centers
And they’re always in need of money. So your kids won’t appreciate you giving their inheritance away.heart wrote: You have to work a lot, as far as I have seen the situation isn't ideal for older people at this point.
I’m a retiree and I moved into one. But I don’t have a family and a minimal pension. I work a lot here. I like being part of a community. I’d be lonely otherwise. So I’m happy. Somebody else might hate the same situation though.
I suspect there will be a few years where the dilettantes like me will retire to Centers. And then we will all die and find out how well we did with our practice!
1.The problem isn’t ‘ignorance’. The problem is the mind you have right now. (H.H. Karmapa XVII @NYC 2/4/18)
2. I support Mingyur R and HHDL in their positions against lama abuse.
3. Student: Lama, I thought I might die but then I realized that the 3 Jewels would protect me.
Lama: Even If you had died the 3 Jewels would still have protected you. (DW post by Fortyeightvows)
2. I support Mingyur R and HHDL in their positions against lama abuse.
3. Student: Lama, I thought I might die but then I realized that the 3 Jewels would protect me.
Lama: Even If you had died the 3 Jewels would still have protected you. (DW post by Fortyeightvows)
- bryandavis
- Posts: 374
- Joined: Sat Oct 06, 2012 2:47 pm
Re: Retreat Centers
An option would be, and this is if it is ones wish, to enter retreat. Most dharma centers with retreat housing options would be happy to take your money on a long term monthly basis. Also many centers will have retreat housing that is much less than renting an apartment, paying a home loan, etc.
You can find something for 600 or less a month im sure as far as space is concerned. Then add 200 at least for food. Then health insurance. Many retreats require you prove you are insured.
If you have no debt and an residual income, or Social Security etc. Then just spend your life in retreat.
If some philanthropist wants to set up a trust fund for me of 800 to 1000 dollars a month I will gladly enter a retreat situation for as long as Im alive.
You can find something for 600 or less a month im sure as far as space is concerned. Then add 200 at least for food. Then health insurance. Many retreats require you prove you are insured.
If you have no debt and an residual income, or Social Security etc. Then just spend your life in retreat.
If some philanthropist wants to set up a trust fund for me of 800 to 1000 dollars a month I will gladly enter a retreat situation for as long as Im alive.
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- Posts: 4209
- Joined: Mon Apr 06, 2009 4:21 am
- Location: California
Re: Retreat Centers
Have you lived in a six month or longer retreat before? You may not like it for the rest of your days.TharpaChodron wrote: ↑Tue May 28, 2019 3:04 pm I'm sure this has been asked a million times before, sorrry, but is there an age limit or similar rules and limitation to moving and living at a retreat center? Is it a possiblilty once one is past age 65 to move to one?
Has your guru suggested that option?
May all seek, find & follow the Path of Buddhas.
Re: Retreat Centers
Sounds enticing, but I don't know if retiring in a full time retreat would be a good option for me. Anyhow, I have a long ways till I could do that. If all goes as hoped, I should have a pretty decent retirement income with pension, savings and social security, though, but who knows really.bryandavis wrote: ↑Tue May 28, 2019 8:37 pm An option would be, and this is if it is ones wish, to enter retreat. Most dharma centers with retreat housing options would be happy to take your money on a long term monthly basis. Also many centers will have retreat housing that is much less than renting an apartment, paying a home loan, etc.
You can find something for 600 or less a month im sure as far as space is concerned. Then add 200 at least for food. Then health insurance. Many retreats require you prove you are insured.
If you have no debt and an residual income, or Social Security etc. Then just spend your life in retreat.
If some philanthropist wants to set up a trust fund for me of 800 to 1000 dollars a month I will gladly enter a retreat situation for as long as Im alive.
Re: Retreat Centers
I have not done a retreat and haven't asked my lama about it either. Figured I'd test the waters here before asking a crazy question.Nicholas Weeks wrote: ↑Tue May 28, 2019 9:14 pmHave you lived in a six month or longer retreat before? You may not like it for the rest of your days.TharpaChodron wrote: ↑Tue May 28, 2019 3:04 pm I'm sure this has been asked a million times before, sorrry, but is there an age limit or similar rules and limitation to moving and living at a retreat center? Is it a possiblilty once one is past age 65 to move to one?
Has your guru suggested that option?
Re: Retreat Centers
Sounds great what you are doing. I think I'd like to be a part of a Dharma community one day. I'm surprised there isn't already an existing Vajrayana retirement community somehwhere...smcj wrote: ↑Tue May 28, 2019 6:38 pmAnd they’re always in need of money. So your kids won’t appreciate you giving their inheritance away.heart wrote: You have to work a lot, as far as I have seen the situation isn't ideal for older people at this point.
I’m a retiree and I moved into one. But I don’t have a family and a minimal pension. I work a lot here. I like being part of a community. I’d be lonely otherwise. So I’m happy. Somebody else might hate the same situation though.
I suspect there will be a few years where the dilettantes like me will retire to Centers. And then we will all die and find out how well we did with our practice!
Re: Retreat Centers
I'm sure you are right, maybe the work requirements for people could be modified. There's a lot of ways older people can be of help besides heavy lifting and the like.heart wrote: ↑Tue May 28, 2019 5:16 pmYou have to work a lot, as far as I have seen the situation isn't ideal for older people at this point.TharpaChodron wrote: ↑Tue May 28, 2019 3:47 pmoh, I guess I meant Dharma center. Do you know of any "typical" rules in this regard?bryandavis wrote: ↑Tue May 28, 2019 3:36 pm It will be dependent upon the rules of the dharma center that has the retreat facilities available.
/magnus
My center has a lot of older people affiliated there, but I don't know what they are up to and it seems rude to ask such details of them. I don't even know if they live on site...I believe there are personal homes very close around the area where people in the Sangha live. But the real estate prices are quite exorbitant so they may have moved there long ago when things were more affordable.
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- Posts: 4209
- Joined: Mon Apr 06, 2009 4:21 am
- Location: California
Re: Retreat Centers
Presuming you are in No. CA, take a look at what Vajrapani offers, both Group & Private retreats. This way you can dip your mind for a few days into a quiet locale.TharpaChodron wrote: ↑Wed May 29, 2019 2:10 am
I have not done a retreat and haven't asked my lama about it either. Figured I'd test the waters here before asking a crazy question.
https://vajrapani.org/faq/#private
May all seek, find & follow the Path of Buddhas.
Re: Retreat Centers
Thanks for the link. I am in California (central) so not too far.Nicholas Weeks wrote: ↑Wed May 29, 2019 2:33 amPresuming you are in No. CA, take a look at what Vajrapani offers, both Group & Private retreats. This way you can dip your mind for a few days into a quiet locale.TharpaChodron wrote: ↑Wed May 29, 2019 2:10 am
I have not done a retreat and haven't asked my lama about it either. Figured I'd test the waters here before asking a crazy question.
https://vajrapani.org/faq/#private
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- Posts: 7885
- Joined: Wed May 29, 2013 6:13 am
Re: Retreat Centers
Here there’s a lot of cooking, cleaning & shopping. Then there’s filling & emptying water bowls, prepping butter lamps (yuck!). Then there’s event stuff like reservations, parking, setting up chairs, & cleaning guest rooms.There's a lot of ways older people can be of help besides heavy lifting and the like.
If you want excuses to not meditate you’ll never run out.
Also be ready for petty soap operas. These places are for the unenlightened. Best if you live off campus. You can drive away.
1.The problem isn’t ‘ignorance’. The problem is the mind you have right now. (H.H. Karmapa XVII @NYC 2/4/18)
2. I support Mingyur R and HHDL in their positions against lama abuse.
3. Student: Lama, I thought I might die but then I realized that the 3 Jewels would protect me.
Lama: Even If you had died the 3 Jewels would still have protected you. (DW post by Fortyeightvows)
2. I support Mingyur R and HHDL in their positions against lama abuse.
3. Student: Lama, I thought I might die but then I realized that the 3 Jewels would protect me.
Lama: Even If you had died the 3 Jewels would still have protected you. (DW post by Fortyeightvows)
Re: Retreat Centers
In my part of the world (Scandinavia) if you are at the center the requests for help with this and that will never end because if you don't do it someone else have to drive up there and do it. So you doing it will always be the best solution.TharpaChodron wrote: ↑Wed May 29, 2019 2:21 amI'm sure you are right, maybe the work requirements for people could be modified. There's a lot of ways older people can be of help besides heavy lifting and the like.heart wrote: ↑Tue May 28, 2019 5:16 pmYou have to work a lot, as far as I have seen the situation isn't ideal for older people at this point.TharpaChodron wrote: ↑Tue May 28, 2019 3:47 pm
oh, I guess I meant Dharma center. Do you know of any "typical" rules in this regard?
/magnus
My center has a lot of older people affiliated there, but I don't know what they are up to and it seems rude to ask such details of them. I don't even know if they live on site...I believe there are personal homes very close around the area where people in the Sangha live. But the real estate prices are quite exorbitant so they may have moved there long ago when things were more affordable.
Don't be shy asking these questions, it is the only way to know. Also listen to smcj, he is already there.
/magnus
"We are all here to help each other go through this thing, whatever it is."
~Kurt Vonnegut
"The principal practice is Guruyoga. But we need to understand that any secondary practice combined with Guruyoga becomes a principal practice." ChNNR (Teachings on Thun and Ganapuja)
~Kurt Vonnegut
"The principal practice is Guruyoga. But we need to understand that any secondary practice combined with Guruyoga becomes a principal practice." ChNNR (Teachings on Thun and Ganapuja)
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- Posts: 359
- Joined: Wed Aug 19, 2015 1:35 pm
Re: Retreat Centers
I was just going to say that I saw there is indeed such a place in France, I saw an ad in a dharma centre's book catalogue last week. Given that it's in France, it probably includes 3 square meals and a bottle of wine a day... Joking aside, I would surprised if there wasn't already something like that in the US somewhere.TharpaChodron wrote:Sounds great what you are doing. I think I'd like to be a part of a Dharma community one day. I'm surprised there isn't already an existing Vajrayana retirement community somehwhere...
Re: Retreat Centers
This is an important topic. I have spent a few years of my life looking after practitioners who did not give this subject any attention. Too old to work some have been pushed out of temples and monasteries.
I'm not sure a center is the best idea for retirement. They are often periodically filled with mentally unstable people, constantly in states of financial distress and under strict hierarchical command. Even your sex life and dating are controlled. Like it or not all your life decisions and spending will be scrutinized. If you have other means I would suggest living NEAR a retreat center. They are places to learn. If you love solitude and have made friends with yourself they may not be ideal locations for retreat.
My ideal solution would be one seen in old Tibet. Freehold town homes on an edge of the property. Living beside practitioners is sublime. Shared accommodation is not IMO. I don't know of anywhere in North America where this is done though.
I'm not sure a center is the best idea for retirement. They are often periodically filled with mentally unstable people, constantly in states of financial distress and under strict hierarchical command. Even your sex life and dating are controlled. Like it or not all your life decisions and spending will be scrutinized. If you have other means I would suggest living NEAR a retreat center. They are places to learn. If you love solitude and have made friends with yourself they may not be ideal locations for retreat.
My ideal solution would be one seen in old Tibet. Freehold town homes on an edge of the property. Living beside practitioners is sublime. Shared accommodation is not IMO. I don't know of anywhere in North America where this is done though.
Re: Retreat Centers
Too funny. I remember Leonard Cohen was asked about his time at Mount Baldy and he said, in a nice way, that the monastery is for sick people, and he made it sound quite noble. Excuses not to meditate, ha.smcj wrote: ↑Wed May 29, 2019 3:18 amHere there’s a lot of cooking, cleaning & shopping. Then there’s filling & emptying water bowls, prepping butter lamps (yuck!). Then there’s event stuff like reservations, parking, setting up chairs, & cleaning guest rooms.There's a lot of ways older people can be of help besides heavy lifting and the like.
If you want excuses to not meditate you’ll never run out.
Also be ready for petty soap operas. These places are for the unenlightened. Best if you live off campus. You can drive away.
Re: Retreat Centers
I'm sure especially if you are handy then your help is always needed, too.heart wrote: ↑Wed May 29, 2019 9:23 amIn my part of the world (Scandinavia) if you are at the center the requests for help with this and that will never end because if you don't do it someone else have to drive up there and do it. So you doing it will always be the best solution.TharpaChodron wrote: ↑Wed May 29, 2019 2:21 amI'm sure you are right, maybe the work requirements for people could be modified. There's a lot of ways older people can be of help besides heavy lifting and the like.
My center has a lot of older people affiliated there, but I don't know what they are up to and it seems rude to ask such details of them. I don't even know if they live on site...I believe there are personal homes very close around the area where people in the Sangha live. But the real estate prices are quite exorbitant so they may have moved there long ago when things were more affordable.
Don't be shy asking these questions, it is the only way to know. Also listen to smcj, he is already there.
/magnus