Allowed to feel tired? (split from:) Pureland Daily Practice by Yogi C.M. Chen

Post Reply
buddhist@wor
Posts: 5
Joined: Fri Mar 26, 2021 3:15 am

Allowed to feel tired? (split from:) Pureland Daily Practice by Yogi C.M. Chen

Post by buddhist@wor »

Hi,

Can you tell me as a buddhist, when we are performing good deeds consistently, trying our best to engage in Bodhisattva path. Are we allowed to feel tired as tired is a negative thing?

Thank you.

I welcome all comments.
User avatar
Budai
Posts: 878
Joined: Fri Aug 14, 2020 1:12 pm
Location: ༀ ∞ Nam Myoho Renge Kyo ∞ ༀ

Re: Allowed to feel tired? (split from:) Pureland Daily Practice by Yogi C.M. Chen

Post by Budai »

Are you magically conjuring tiredness up on an immaculate flawless perfected body, as a purposeful hindrance, or is it something that is happening because of circumstance in your human body, here in Kali-Yuga where tiredness is a daily human thing? Something to ponder!
User avatar
PadmaVonSamba
Posts: 9439
Joined: Sat May 14, 2011 1:41 am

Re: Allowed to feel tired? (split from:) Pureland Daily Practice by Yogi C.M. Chen

Post by PadmaVonSamba »

I once heard a funny term, “boyscout-sattva” meaning a Buddhist who runs around ‘helping little old ladies cross the street’ and trying to do all sorts of tiny heroic acts.
It’s good to develop positive actions so that they become part of everything, effortlessly, spontaneously, so that eventually you are doing positive things without even noticing it. But you don’t need to be a super-hero.
If you become attached to doing good deeds. That is also self-grasping. This also holds true for being a ‘martyr’ and allowing for things which harm you, thinking that doing so is some great act of selflessness. These are common issues with people practicing Dharma seriously. Recall the teachings of the Buddha to the sitar(?) player about not winding the strings either too tightly or too loosely. If you are tired from your Bodhisattva efforts, your strings may be wound too tightly.
EMPTIFUL.
An inward outlook produces outward insight.
User avatar
Könchok Thrinley
Former staff member
Posts: 3275
Joined: Fri Jul 24, 2015 11:18 am
Location: He/Him from EU

Re: Allowed to feel tired? (split from:) Pureland Daily Practice by Yogi C.M. Chen

Post by Könchok Thrinley »

Padma is great as always.

I'd just add that while "doing good deeds" whatever that really means, is great. But! You must not forget about yourself. One does not become a buddha through good deeds. You have to train yourself and pacify your mind. Even a bodhisattva who has promised to attain enlightenment only after everyone else did needs to have the skill, wisdom and power to actually help.

I wouldn't take feeling tired as a "breakage of vows" but as a sign that you still have to work on yourself. So don't be afraid to slow down and relax.
“Observing samaya involves to remain inseparable from the union of wisdom and compassion at all times, to sustain mindfulness, and to put into practice the guru’s instructions”. Garchen Rinpoche

For those who do virtuous actions,
goodness is what comes to pass.
For those who do non-virtuous actions,
that becomes suffering indeed.

- Arya Sanghata Sutra
User avatar
Hazel
Former staff member
Posts: 2090
Joined: Mon Sep 23, 2019 11:15 pm
Location: she/her

Re: Allowed to feel tired? (split from:) Pureland Daily Practice by Yogi C.M. Chen

Post by Hazel »

You're "allowed" to be anything. The teachings just point out there are activities that are made difficult by being tired. It doesn't mean it's evil.

If you weren't supposed to be tied, how would you sleep!
Happy Pride month to my queer dharma siblings!

What do you see when you turn out the lights?
buddhist@wor
Posts: 5
Joined: Fri Mar 26, 2021 3:15 am

Re: Allowed to feel tired? (split from:) Pureland Daily Practice by Yogi C.M. Chen

Post by buddhist@wor »

Thanks all! My question is simple, are we allowed to get tired if we are performing good deeds daily? Performing good deeds should be willingly and happily and definitely not something to perform just because someone say so or done on purpose!
Yes, ordinary beings practising the Bodhisattvas way do get tired cos we are all human being without super power. Practising Bodhisattva path means everything here and not only through action. But also speech and mind.
buddhist@wor
Posts: 5
Joined: Fri Mar 26, 2021 3:15 am

Re: Allowed to feel tired? (split from:) Pureland Daily Practice by Yogi C.M. Chen

Post by buddhist@wor »

Hazel wrote: Fri Mar 26, 2021 1:15 pm You're "allowed" to be anything. The teachings just point out there are activities that are made difficult by being tired. It doesn't mean it's evil.

If you weren't supposed to be tied, how would you sleep!
Thank you so much! I am no wonder woman.
buddhist@wor
Posts: 5
Joined: Fri Mar 26, 2021 3:15 am

Re: Allowed to feel tired? (split from:) Pureland Daily Practice by Yogi C.M. Chen

Post by buddhist@wor »

Könchok Thrinley wrote: Fri Mar 26, 2021 1:14 pm Padma is great as always.

I'd just add that while "doing good deeds" whatever that really means, is great. But! You must not forget about yourself. One does not become a buddha through good deeds. You have to train yourself and pacify your mind. Even a bodhisattva who has promised to attain enlightenment only after everyone else did needs to have the skill, wisdom and power to actually help.

I wouldn't take feeling tired as a "breakage of vows" but as a sign that you still have to work on yourself. So don't be afraid to slow down and relax.
Thank you so much! I am exhausted sometimes but always happy:).
buddhist@wor
Posts: 5
Joined: Fri Mar 26, 2021 3:15 am

Re: Allowed to feel tired? (split from:) Pureland Daily Practice by Yogi C.M. Chen

Post by buddhist@wor »

PadmaVonSamba wrote: Fri Mar 26, 2021 12:37 pm I once heard a funny term, “boyscout-sattva” meaning a Buddhist who runs around ‘helping little old ladies cross the street’ and trying to do all sorts of tiny heroic acts.
It’s good to develop positive actions so that they become part of everything, effortlessly, spontaneously, so that eventually you are doing positive things without even noticing it. But you don’t need to be a super-hero.
If you become attached to doing good deeds. That is also self-grasping. This also holds true for being a ‘martyr’ and allowing for things which harm you, thinking that doing so is some great act of selflessness. These are common issues with people practicing Dharma seriously. Recall the teachings of the Buddha to the sitar(?) player about not winding the strings either too tightly or too loosely. If you are tired from your Bodhisattva efforts, your strings may be wound too tightly.
Thanks for your advice. I really love helping the weak and helpless. Doesn't matter the strings:). I will rest if its too tight:).
User avatar
PadmaVonSamba
Posts: 9439
Joined: Sat May 14, 2011 1:41 am

Re: Allowed to feel tired? (split from:) Pureland Daily Practice by Yogi C.M. Chen

Post by PadmaVonSamba »

I have a friend who many years ago used to look after a friend of hers who had a lot of health issues. My friend is a really kind and loving person, always volunteers to help others, and so on. So when her friend’s health started to take a serious turn for the worse, she spent most of her time with him. Nothing unusual about that.
But even long before his decline (and eventual death) it seems that her world revolved around him. And when he did pass away, she was incredibly depressed by it. Again, that’s not an unusual response.
The thing is, her reaction was almost as though his death was a surprise. And while she truly did love and sincerely care about her friend, she was also using him, without realizing it. She herself had a lot of life issues but focusing on his problems allowed her to avoid dealing with her own problems. Also, the more she did for him, driving him places or feeding him, the more she began to see herself as kind of, his savior. She would frequently make a point of telling others how much she had been doing or sacrificing to help him. Of course, the worse his condition got, the more of a savior she became.
But then, when he died, that all ended. Her world collapsed along with the savior-identity she had created for herself. Suddenly she had no diversion and had to face her own issues (which was even harder with the sadness of losing her friend). She now had to face her own problems without even knowing who she was herself.
So, I think this is something we ‘aspiring bodhisattvas’ need to watch out for. It’s a mixed bag. On the one hand, through selfless acts one can cut through self-grasping and ego-clinging. On the other hand, it can become just another ego trip, a kind of spiritual or Buddhist cosplay.

I think the red flag to look out for is the subtle need for a reward. I’m not suggesting that anyone here is falling into that. But just stay alert, look at one’s own mind and motivations. Yes, there is some degree of satisfaction and fulfillment that comes from helping others. Shantideva makes that clear. Real happiness comes from that. Just be careful that it doesn’t become a fantasy. Otherwise, when you do all this stuff for everybody else and there’s no payback, you’ll feel betrayed, and think the Dharma teachings are a big lie. Lots of pain and confusion.
I think that’s part of the importance of dedicating merit. But still, even that can become part of the act.
Always examine your own thoughts. Be careful about your motivation. That’s what I’ve learned.
EMPTIFUL.
An inward outlook produces outward insight.
Post Reply

Return to “Pure Land”