Sometimes I feel small and the world feels even smaller. Claustrophobic. How can I experience the opposite?

Discussion of meditation in the Mahayana and Vajrayana traditions.
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kenteramin
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Sometimes I feel small and the world feels even smaller. Claustrophobic. How can I experience the opposite?

Post by kenteramin »

So, the title is a mess. I didn't know how to phrase the question. And the rest is going to be even more confusion. Sorry :)
Also, I couldn't figure out what's the right place to ask. The experience I'm going to describe is not related to any particular meditation technique, mb to a form of non-dual practices.

In ordinary awareness (mode?) I feel small, contained and the world feels expansive, vast. It's mostly because of the visual perception. Bodily sensations, thoughts, feelings, etc, feel like they don't inhabit space. One dimensioned. I'll try to trow some more adjectives. Those sensations feel contained, compact, connected, limited, closed. And the visual perception has depth, space, distance, it is infinite and has dimensions.
Sometimes when I play with my visual awareness I feel it diminishes, looses depth. It's not that I am in the world. It's the world is in 'me'. I loose the source of space, of vastness, of dimensionality.

It's like the world as a reflection in a crystal ball vs the world as an appearance in a crystal ball. Where the crystal ball is me.
I've heard oftentimes how people experience infinite consciousness. It feels like absolute opposite of that.
Do you have an idea what is this feeling/perception about? Why does it happen? How do I reach for the opposite of that?

I guess one appropriate answer to my post is 'drop the shi that's getting you into that state and do some proper meditation'.


P.S. I hope we can avoid unnecessary pointings to anatta. All the first person pronouns are provisional
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Johnny Dangerous
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Re: Sometimes I feel small and the world feels even smaller. Claustrophobic. How can I experience the opposite?

Post by Johnny Dangerous »

You really should get the help of “a professional” - I.e. a qualified Buddhist teacher.

That said, in my experience the feeling of occlusion, obstruction and claustrophobia is directly related to identification with and reification of form. If you can observe the process there is some possibility of space around it. If you can’t observe the process of identification though, it is literally outside of your vision and you really need instructions in (as one example) Vipaysana over a period of time to see it.

Ymmv, caveat emptor and all that.

Outside of that, Tarthang Tulku has a series of “giant body” meditations in Time Space and Knowledge that are meant to approach this. The book is completely unrestricted afaik.
Meditate upon Bodhicitta when afflicted by disease

Meditate upon Bodhicitta when sad

Meditate upon Bodhicitta when suffering occurs

Meditate upon Bodhicitta when you are scared

-Khunu Lama
kenteramin
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Re: Sometimes I feel small and the world feels even smaller. Claustrophobic. How can I experience the opposite?

Post by kenteramin »

Johnny Dangerous wrote: Wed Jan 19, 2022 7:23 pm You really should get the help of “a professional” - I.e. a qualified Buddhist teacher.

That said, in my experience the feeling of occlusion, obstruction and claustrophobia is directly related to identification with and reification of form. If you can observe the process there is some possibility of space around it. If you can’t observe the process of identification though, it is literally outside of your vision and you really need instructions in (as one example) Vipaysana over a period of time to see it.

Ymmv, caveat emptor and all that.

Outside of that, Tarthang Tulku has a series of “giant body” meditations in Time Space and Knowledge that are meant to approach this. The book is completely unrestricted afaik.
:anjali:
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PadmaVonSamba
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Re: Sometimes I feel small and the world feels even smaller. Claustrophobic. How can I experience the opposite?

Post by PadmaVonSamba »

In the universe, we are inconceivably small. Smaller than you can even experience. It’s okay.
EMPTIFUL.
An inward outlook produces outward insight.
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