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The "Dinner Sutta" - Dhamma Wheel

The "Dinner Sutta"

A discussion on all aspects of Theravāda Buddhism
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Nibbida
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The "Dinner Sutta"

Postby Nibbida » Wed Oct 27, 2010 3:17 pm

I remember a sutta where the Buddha says that if a person is invited to a meal and accepts the food, it becomes that person's. On the other hand, if he does not accept the food, it still belongs to the host. He uses this as an analogy for responsibility for choices. When I search Access to Insight, the key word "dinner" or "meal" brings up numerous hits, for obvious reasons.

Can anyone recall the sutta or help guide me to it?

:anjali:

Individual
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Re: The "Dinner Sutta"

Postby Individual » Wed Oct 27, 2010 4:07 pm

I don't see how this is profound.

Let's say I invite you over for dinner. If we argue before dinner and I ask you to leave, are you entitled to bag up the uneaten food on the plate?

If we argue after dinner and I ask you to leave, am I entitled to the food in your stomach?

Perhaps you are wondering: At what point does ingested food become part of the self?
The best things in life aren't things.


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Kare
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Re: The "Dinner Sutta"

Postby Kare » Wed Oct 27, 2010 4:40 pm

I think this may be the one that you are looking for:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Cn7ZW8ts3Y

The point is not the dinner, but that you can say politely "no, thank you" to insults - and then the insults stay with the person who try to insult you.

The story is really quite funny, and if you tell it to kids, they have no difficulty seeing the point.
Mettāya,
Kåre

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cooran
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Re: The "Dinner Sutta"

Postby cooran » Wed Oct 27, 2010 6:28 pm

hello all,

Akkosa Sutta -- Insult
http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka ... .than.html

Many of the miseries in ordinary life can be caused by accepting as 'our own' the insults, verbal violence and manipulations of others. So I sometimes relate the story of the sutta,putting it into a modern context with everyday names, without any religious trappings whatsoever. It has changed many of my clients from habitually being hurt and devastated by the insults and slights of others, into realising who really 'owns' the problem, i.e. the insulter.

with metta
Chris
---The trouble is that you think you have time---
---Worry is the Interest, paid in advance, on a debt you may never owe---
---It's not what happens to you in life that is important ~ it's what you do with it ---

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Nibbida
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Re: The "Dinner Sutta"

Postby Nibbida » Wed Oct 27, 2010 8:17 pm

Chris, thank you very much. That's exactly it.

Getting upset at an insult requires active cooperation of the person being insulted. Cheri Huber said "It is impossible to control whether or not someone else gets offended." Elanor Roosevelt said "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." The same could be said about any emotion since the final causes of suffering or happiness are internal.

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Ben
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Re: The "Dinner Sutta"

Postby Ben » Wed Oct 27, 2010 8:21 pm

“No lists of things to be done. The day providential to itself. The hour. There is no later. This is later. All things of grace and beauty such that one holds them to one's heart have a common provenance in pain. Their birth in grief and ashes.”
- Cormac McCarthy, The Road

Learn this from the waters:
in mountain clefts and chasms,
loud gush the streamlets,
but great rivers flow silently.
- Sutta Nipata 3.725

(Buddhist aid in Myanmar) • •

e: [email protected]..

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cooran
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Re: The "Dinner Sutta"

Postby cooran » Wed Oct 27, 2010 8:31 pm

Hello Ben,

Actually ¬ as a lot of people love roast vegies, I had to change the example I give to ‘’Imagine if you were giving a very Swish dinner party, fully catered, and a person turned up at the front door with a huge tray of stinking boiled cabbage and turnips, and demanded you put it in the centre of the buffet table……’’ :tongue:

The story stays in people's minds. I passed an ex-client in the city a while ago and, after saying hello, she said ''I haven't accepted any cabbage or turnips for months'' .

with metta
Chris
---The trouble is that you think you have time---
---Worry is the Interest, paid in advance, on a debt you may never owe---
---It's not what happens to you in life that is important ~ it's what you do with it ---

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Kare
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Re: The "Dinner Sutta"

Postby Kare » Wed Oct 27, 2010 8:34 pm

Mettāya,
Kåre

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Nibbida
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Re: The "Dinner Sutta"

Postby Nibbida » Wed Oct 27, 2010 9:24 pm


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Kare
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Re: The "Dinner Sutta"

Postby Kare » Wed Oct 27, 2010 10:15 pm

Mettāya,
Kåre

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Kim OHara
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Re: The "Dinner Sutta"

Postby Kim OHara » Thu Oct 28, 2010 12:20 am


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mikenz66
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Re: The "Dinner Sutta"

Postby mikenz66 » Thu Oct 28, 2010 1:12 am


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Kim OHara
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Re: The "Dinner Sutta"

Postby Kim OHara » Thu Oct 28, 2010 11:29 am

Not to worry too much, Mike. I was one of the twenty or so singers who got quite lost at various stages. :embarassed:
It was in the romanesque cathedral that is not in the city centre - is that the Catholic one? - about 8 years ago. The acoustics and the general effect were nice and the details were ... mercifully obscured by the resonance.

:namaste:
Kim

Now ... :focus:

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mikenz66
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Re: The "Dinner Sutta"

Postby mikenz66 » Thu Oct 28, 2010 8:16 pm



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