are you polishing a brick? whats the use of polishing. the brick is already a perfect brick.
just naturally be. meditate when you meditate. relax when you relax. you are already perfectly so.
theres nothing to realize, realizing nothing is not necessary. you are perfectly so.
in enlightenment, there is no flavour, no tasting, no experience, nothing special.
forgetting your realization is natural. awakenings come and go, rise and fall.
studying at the computer is enlightenment, meditation is enlightenment, eating is enlightenment, sleeping is enlightenment, working in a normal or any job is enlightenment. enlightenment is all things since there is no state called perfective enlightenment. even the spots on your face are perfect enlightenment. there is not a thing that is not perfect enlightenment, this is since there is no state called perfect enlightenment.
if there was a state called perfect enlightenment, it would then not be perfect enlightenment, since it would be a state and all states are subject to coming and going. if i say "i am enlightened", that is a state, and subject to coming and going, experiencing and then forgetting. there is no enlightenment. it cannot be said in enlightenment that i am enlightened, except in that everything is enlightened.emptiness is not, enlightenment is not. in being not... it is. in being absolutely no thing it represents absolutely every thing. in no dharma is found all dharma. even delusion is perfect enlightenment. there is no need to know that we are enlightened or deluded, there is no difference.
in zen they sometimes say... 'this is it'
practice is it, polish the mirror as much as you like. non practice is it, why polish a brick? be free. dont burden yourself with unpleasant practices, practice with freedom and no effort (effortlessness). trying too hard you might damage your practice. treat your practice like a little green plant, be gentle with it, water it and give it sunhsine, but dont try to force it to grow. that will only kill it or stunt its growth.
best wishes, White Lotus.just relax.
wait and you will see.
seek and you will find.