ghost01 wrote:Hi duckfiasco,
The thing's we most tightly grasp, are ideas, emotions and thoughts. When we learn to deal with these everything else becomes easier, and more clear. What I mean to say is we start by understanding that we are not our thoughts, emotions and ideas. There is no I to which these things refer. There are emotions, there are thoughts, there are ideas about this, and that.
It takes practice. Meditation and remaining mindful at all times is very helpful in letting us see this clearly. If you do not currently practice meditation, Definitely look into it.. walking meditation and zazen work well for this purpose in my experience. Any type of meditation will do though.
Compassion is compassion, I'm not sure if there is an 'idiot compassion', but once we understand some of the core ideologies in Buddhism we begin to see a picture that is far more altruistic, and combined with practice leads to a true sense of connection and compassion for others, and ourselves.
Though, take my advice with a grain of salt.
ghost01 wrote:Compassion is compassion, I'm not sure if there is an 'idiot compassion', but once we understand some of the core ideologies in Buddhism we begin to see a picture that is far more altruistic, and combined with practice leads to a true sense of connection and compassion for others, and ourselves.
catmoon wrote:Attachment is not something you bundle up and throw out with the trash. It's more like a sculpture you chip away at. There are several methods, one of which is meditation on impermanence. Today's most treasured friend may be gone tomorrow, to a new job, a new town or even the next life. So, if you set up a great attachment to something or someone impermanent, you will suffer greatly when inevitable change occurs.
Aura wrote:In order to achieve friendship without attachment,
one must mindfully attend to identifying and meeting one's own needs and cultivating one's own growth and development,
in concert and balance with compassionately attending to the needs of others on this earth.
Over-attending to the latter without adequate attention to the former will create clinging rather than growth for all parties involved.
Adumbra wrote:If you are investing all this time and affection in your friend because you expect to recieve love or validation in return you are making yourself vulnerable. I'm not saying such a motive is wrong -- your friend may be a very loving person and give you what you are asking for -- but it does make you vulnerable to suffering disappointment and heartbreak.
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