Question on material attachment

General discussion, particularly exploring the Dharma in the modern world.
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DeepFriedFunk
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Question on material attachment

Post by DeepFriedFunk »

I was speaking to my friend earlier and I was telling her I would like to make my own mala beads because they would mean more to me. Now is sentimental attachment to an item, for instance the chain I wear because my grandad fought Nazi's with the French Resistance.

Is there a difference between sentimental attachment and say.... attachment to your phone because its the newest one out?
teknix
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Re: Question on material attachment

Post by teknix »

Really there is no differences in that it all is an "idea" that you are something separate from the universe in its entirety.

It is not something separate from what you are, a collection of atoms experiencing entanglement, a memory which continues after the bond is broken as I believe is proven through non-locality. Atoms do not fundamentally own each other, they only interact. Emotional attachments are a bit more deeply ingrained through tradition , culture, society, and other sorts of "norms" that build a perceived actuality falsely imposed upon actuality. Finding the attachments and acknowledging them is the first step to being free from them. Next you find the root of the attachment and relinquish whatever conditioning was present to cause the misconception of anything separate to be attached too. You are only thinking that others can control how you feel emotionally, that isn't true of actuality, we choose it somehow, and that somehow is what connects it as an attachment. Find it and then let it go.
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DeepFriedFunk
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Re: Question on material attachment

Post by DeepFriedFunk »

As i have realized that there are so many contributing factors in life. Mindfulness has shown me the connected nature of everything. Even whilst buying food I consider the life it's had. Where it came from, who grew it, the soil it grew from. It's all intrinsically connected. Part of the banana I am buying. Correct me if I am wrong.

I feel the chain isnt a gold chain. It's my grandad. It went everywhere with him. I know killing and war are awful things but when it came down to it, he had to do what he did to fight a larger evil (Nazi's) He was SAS trained and parachuted into the Pyranees and train members of the resistance. He was also a very compassionate man despite the horrible things he did. I know he took a lot of lives - he was a good commander. He suffered badly with PTSD.

I never knew him but i still feel connected, he is within me, part of me. The as same as my mother is part of me. The chain went through hell and back with him. I feel it has a huge connection to my grandfather.

Considering this, i dont see it as a chain. I see it as a representation of his former life, a connection to him. I do not really see it as a material item as such.

Ideas?
teknix
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Re: Question on material attachment

Post by teknix »

Yes, that is what I was pointing towards, Mindfulness.

So how does the pendant feel like energetically and/or emotionally?
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DeepFriedFunk
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Re: Question on material attachment

Post by DeepFriedFunk »

Well obviously the subject has changed from mala beads to chain in question.

I did feel as though I had lost something. I mean i literally lost the chain. But i mean I had lost something in me. Despite the fact it took 20 mins of meditation in order to accept the loss of a material item so close to heart. I still realized my closest connection to him is me. He is a part of me and always will be so I accepted the loss of the chain.

once I had accepted it's loss it was then returned. Returned as in this was a spiritual lesson I had learned and thusly rewarded with it's return to me.

I have been studying and referring to myself as a Buddhist for around 4 months. I was still very spiritual compared to your average joe beforehand. Very strange things keep happening when practising mantras or taking part in a puja. I was athiest so i need proof. I am getting it. But still it seems either coincidental or amazing. To be honest more amazing because I am noticing the effect Buddhism is having. Raised as a Catholic i never saw the power of god manifest in the same way that the Dharma does.

It really has turned my life around and helped immensely. I am still slightly skeptical but old habits die hard ey ;)
teknix
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Re: Question on material attachment

Post by teknix »

I feel that lineages are amongst the most potent and strong bonds, it may sound harsh and cold but it may be that you consider it "your grandfather" "your mother" "your brother", whereas if we looked at everyone else with this same affinity, the individualistic aspect falls away to reveal the underlying current. Love does not go anywhere, it never has, it is that same place we all connect, all you have to do is go there. You may think I'm wandering "off-topic" but that tiny connection you have with "your family" is not limited to anything less then all of humanity. Such things as these individual connections begin to appear trivial and even selfish.

If you think that there is a spirit connected to it, it is plausible in quantum mechanics when considering entanglements. Maybe these atoms retain far more information of the surrounding than is being made evident and apparent.
zerwe
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Re: Question on material attachment

Post by zerwe »

Attachment is attachment plain and simple. However, it does not mean that we can't appreciate things for what they are. I certainly can appreciate the feelings and sentimentality you have described.
As far as practice is concerned though, keep in mind that we can run into trouble when we project ideas upon phenomena that are not based in reality.
Shaun :namaste:
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Konchog1
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Re: Question on material attachment

Post by Konchog1 »

DeepFriedFunk wrote:I was speaking to my friend earlier and I was telling her I would like to make my own mala beads because they would mean more to me. Now is sentimental attachment to an item, for instance the chain I wear because my grandad fought Nazi's with the French Resistance.

Is there a difference between sentimental attachment and say.... attachment to your phone because its the newest one out?
Attachment means that you'd miss the item, not that you like it.
Equanimity is the ground. Love is the moisture. Compassion is the seed. Bodhicitta is the result.

-Paraphrase of Khensur Rinpoche Lobsang Tsephel citing the Guhyasamaja Tantra

"All memories and thoughts are the union of emptiness and knowing, the Mind.
Without attachment, self-liberating, like a snake in a knot.
Through the qualities of meditating in that way,
Mental obscurations are purified and the dharmakaya is attained."

-Ra Lotsawa, All-pervading Melodious Drumbeats
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Virgo
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Re: Question on material attachment

Post by Virgo »

DeepFriedFunk wrote:I was speaking to my friend earlier and I was telling her I would like to make my own mala beads because they would mean more to me. Now is sentimental attachment to an item, for instance the chain I wear because my grandad fought Nazi's with the French Resistance.

Is there a difference between sentimental attachment and say.... attachment to your phone because its the newest one out?
No.
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Bhavana
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Re: Question on material attachment

Post by Bhavana »

I have a lot of things that have been passed down to me through my family, some of them have monetary value, some just sentimental - and I plan to pass them along to my nieces later on. I don't think there is anything wrong with liking to have these things, I mean, I loved my grandparents, and family IS important - it is a big part of who we are. I know about attachment - but as long as my attachment to these things is not unhealthy - such as I can't live without them, etc, then what does it hurt? I will never be, nor do I want to be, the kind of person who has one set of clothes, one cup, one dish, one pencil, living in one room, and so on. I can imagine that there are many nice things about going thru life with no baggage - but I LIKE some material things, I like to have beautiful things around me. And I really do need a lot of my STUFF to do the things I enjoy doing....(though I do think I could pare down just a little)

I thought about making my own mala beads as well - but more to save money. So I looked into the materials and found that by the time I buy all the stuff needed to make them, I could buy a nice set for much less. Possibly making them would make them a little more special, and I will definitely try it in the future.
Odsal
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Re: Question on material attachment

Post by Odsal »

DeepFriedFunk wrote:I was speaking to my friend earlier and I was telling her I would like to make my own mala beads because they would mean more to me. Now is sentimental attachment to an item, for instance the chain I wear because my grandad fought Nazi's with the French Resistance.

Is there a difference between sentimental attachment and say.... attachment to your phone because its the newest one out?
Hi,
I think if making your own mala will inspire you to practice then it is a good idea. But I don't think it is really that important as long you use it.
I think it would be better if you could have one made for you by a Lama or another practitioner.
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Distorted
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Re: Question on material attachment

Post by Distorted »

DeepFriedFunk wrote:I was speaking to my friend earlier and I was telling her I would like to make my own mala beads because they would mean more to me. Now is sentimental attachment to an item, for instance the chain I wear because my grandad fought Nazi's with the French Resistance.

Is there a difference between sentimental attachment and say.... attachment to your phone because its the newest one out?
I have been thinking of doing the same thing. I want to use nylon twine and make 108 knots for the 108 beads and tie a endless knot for the Guru bead. Though that may take some time so I just may buy one for now to get to the original reason why I should have one. :D
"Sona, before you became a monk you were a musician". Sona said that was true. So the Buddha said, "As a musician which string of the lute produces a pleasant and harmonious sound. The over-tight string?" "No," said Sona, "The over-tight string produces an unpleasant sound and is moreover likely to break at any moment." "The string that is too loose?" Again, "No, the string that is too loose does not produce a tuneful sound. The string that produces a tuneful sound is the string that is not too tight and not too loose."
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