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Loss and sadness - Dhamma Wheel

Loss and sadness

Casual discussion amongst spiritual friends.
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Annapurna
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Loss and sadness

Postby Annapurna » Mon Jun 28, 2010 12:43 pm

I wonder what you recommend for me to read.

I'm going through a difficult period of my life, where I feel increasingly stuck with duties and too little joy.

I received bad news within the past 3 weeks.

My 2 best friends in town will move away. Claudia will move away with her boyfriend, and I will miss it terribly to just sit with her and chat, doing things with her.

My Ex has become a good friend, who supported me in things around the house which are too hard for me to do, if not impossible.

He lived in a very noisy environment that took a lot of him due and now found something about 40 km away from me now.

Since he told me yesterday, I am in tears, because I fear becoming lonely now.

Advice and comfort welcome. :weep:
http://www.schmuckzauberei.blogspot.com/

PeterB
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Re: Loss and sadness

Postby PeterB » Mon Jun 28, 2010 1:14 pm

Your post reminded me of a time in my life some years ago Anna. I had two particularly close male friends. One had been treated for cancer for a number of years, he suddenly deteriorated and then died. The other was a monk who moved to a monastery in Thailand.
I felt bereft for a while. After a time these losses became a motivation or perhaps impetus to examine really closely the fact of anicca, and the swift passing of all things. What had started as a cause for sorrow became the keys to open the prison door at least a little. The prison being the need we have to somehow hold back time and change. The wanting we sometimes have to keep things as they were. We cant rush it or wish the pain of parting away, but we can weave it into a deeper understanding of the constancy of change.

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OcTavO
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Re: Loss and sadness

Postby OcTavO » Mon Jun 28, 2010 1:16 pm

:console:

It's always sad when friends leave town. I would recommend focusing some time on the lives of others more in need. Perhaps volunteering at a charity, hospital, hospice, or animal shelter. I find it has an almost magical ability to dispell my own problems when I do such activities. It might help.

You could also look for a social group in your area where you might find new friends... try "meetup.com"

Edit: I noticed you asked for something to read. Although they're Vajryana instead of Theravada, I'd recommend the consolation found in Pema Chodron's books. She writes with great warmth and gentleness about opening up to change in our lives.

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Annapurna
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Re: Loss and sadness

Postby Annapurna » Mon Jun 28, 2010 6:46 pm

http://www.schmuckzauberei.blogspot.com/

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Annapurna
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Re: Loss and sadness

Postby Annapurna » Mon Jun 28, 2010 7:01 pm

http://www.schmuckzauberei.blogspot.com/

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OcTavO
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Re: Loss and sadness

Postby OcTavO » Tue Jun 29, 2010 9:48 am


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Ben
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Re: Loss and sadness

Postby Ben » Tue Jun 29, 2010 11:18 am

H Anna

I'm sorry to read of your troubles. I hope you find some comfort, strength and support here, among your Dhamma Wheel friends. I'll be thinking of you tonight during metta bhavana.
kind regards

Ben
“No lists of things to be done. The day providential to itself. The hour. There is no later. This is later. All things of grace and beauty such that one holds them to one's heart have a common provenance in pain. Their birth in grief and ashes.”
- Cormac McCarthy, The Road

Learn this from the waters:
in mountain clefts and chasms,
loud gush the streamlets,
but great rivers flow silently.
- Sutta Nipata 3.725

(Buddhist aid in Myanmar) • •

e: [email protected]..

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Annapurna
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Re: Loss and sadness

Postby Annapurna » Tue Jun 29, 2010 11:25 am

Thank you Ben. I am happy to have my Dhammawheel friends. Thank you for your kindness.

Octavo, that sounds interesting. Still in May, tables were turned, my friends came to me, crying because they were suffering.

How impermanent everything is...
http://www.schmuckzauberei.blogspot.com/

PeterB
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Re: Loss and sadness

Postby PeterB » Wed Jun 30, 2010 2:22 pm

Everything is, Anna...

Well, to quote the dolphins in The Hitchikers Guide To The Galaxy..so long folks and thanks for all the fish.

:anjali:

sattva
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Re: Loss and sadness

Postby sattva » Fri Jul 02, 2010 6:00 pm

sending hug

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Annapurna
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Re: Loss and sadness

Postby Annapurna » Fri Jul 02, 2010 9:26 pm

http://www.schmuckzauberei.blogspot.com/


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