My son's safety

Requesting and offering prayers and aspirations for those in need.
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My son's safety

Postby Madeliaette » Mon Dec 05, 2011 6:39 pm

I would like to ask anyone with time and inclination to offer prayers for my son to remain safe and work his way through some great difficulties that have arisen in his life, please.
(I have been doing Tara/Buddha visualizations, Om Mani's, burning incense and praying for purification and protection.)

The story is long - but as breifly as possible - I spent 20 years protecting my son from a mentally ill ex who did not take the medication he was prescribed and became abusive spiritually, mentally, verbally, and physically. On learning I was pregnant, he threatened to kill us both if I did not have an abortion - which I did not have. I split up from him at 3 weeks pregnant and do not recognize him as the father, although putting his name on the birth certificate as we were legally attached. His mother and sister are involved in black magic and spiritual manipulation. I have fled interstate, used NAI spiritual protection, and assumed that once he reached 18 he would be safe.

My son lived with me until I had to fly overseas to England to take care of my elderly father, first PT but now FT, with my son intending to follow me over as soon as he could organize his dual citizenship passports. In the meantime he took over the rental tenancy for a few months, then moved into crisis accomodation. He finally flew over to England last december, a year after I arrived. He was instantly homesick for his freinds at crisis accom. I asked him to stay a few months, then return if he still felt like it - hoping he might get a job and make freidns here too. He seemed to be sore at me since then and i assumed he blamed me for holding him here when he wanted to be there.

On Nov 22, he flew back to Australia - telling us that he was going to return to the crisis accom. I heard nothing for over a week, and on investigating discovered he had gone to the place of my ex and his dangerous family. I dont know how long he had been in contact with them, if they tracke him down online and aproached him, or if crsiis accom suggested the link. I heard nothing til a few days ago when he emailed to ask me to pay his airfare back to England and declared he hated me - then a few hours later that he might go to where he had used to live in NSW. I had a third email a few days ago saying he was taking a bus to where he used to live and would arrive Monday. I have been in contact with the crisis accom, and they tell me he has arrived. It looks like he intends to try to move back there.

Whilst I have spent most of my energy this week praying and protecting him as best I can, and he seems to be out of immediate danger, I am concerned about the long term effects of his having spent a week in the company of those people. I am worried that he may keep in touch with them and be in more danger in his future.

If anyone can reccommend a specific practice or prayer that might be appropriate, i would like to do all i can to protect him and purify him of their unwholesome influences so that he can sort out his own mind properly. To me, it is akin to if he had joined a crazy religious cult that is unlikely to let go.

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Re: My son's safety

Postby catmoon » Mon Dec 05, 2011 7:02 pm

Being a bit of a Medicine Buddha nut, I will of course recommend doing the empowerment and sadhana for healing. Or I can do it for you.

I hope the authorities in Australia have been informed of the risks your son is exposed to.

Meantime, I'll warm up my beads for ya.
Sergeant Schultz knew everything there was to know.

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Re: My son's safety

Postby mint » Mon Dec 05, 2011 7:23 pm

I understand your son's position somewhat. My father is somewhat psychotic, as well. He threatened to kill my mother and so much more. He basically sold me: agreed to give up visitation rights when I was 10 so he didn't have to pay for my education, and he barely paid child support. Even so, I had this great urge to track him down and meet him. Wrong idea! No wonder I'm so messed up.

But I can also tell the great distress you are in. I can't relate to that, really. But my prayers go out to you.

O MY JESUS, forgive us our sins, save us
from the fires of Hell; lead all souls to
Heaven, especially those in most need of
Thy mercy. Amen.

HAIL MARY, full of grace, the Lord is
with thee. Blessed art thou among women,
and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us
sinners, now and at the hour of our death.

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Re: My son's safety

Postby dakini_boi » Mon Dec 05, 2011 11:47 pm

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Re: My son's safety

Postby Madeliaette » Tue Dec 06, 2011 5:14 am

Thank you all - ^ I had an email from my son this morning and now that he has left that family and their state, he seems to have sorted his mind out a bit.
He is still uncertain about where he will live short/long term and confused until he knows if he can stay where he is, but i think the key point in my concerns is sorted - as he seems to be able to see the dangers that might crop up in the future if they track him down and to not want that to happen. Therefore, I think he will get through this mess that he got himself into - for the time being. :namaste:

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Re: My son's safety

Postby Asabandha » Sat Dec 10, 2011 5:36 am

Hello Madeliaette,

I hope you will take comfort in knowing that the negativity your son may have been exposed to is a weak, superficial force indeed when faced with the loving-kindness born of emptiness. Even loving-kindness that simply reflects emptiness without any realization is more powerful than all the forces of hatred and desire in the entire universe. Please have faith that your son, being of you and intimately connected to your mindstream, will be embraced by your loving-kindness and that this seed will naturally grow within him, protecting him in dark times and leading him towards peace.

In times like this it is so important to perfect loving-kindness. That means extending it not just to your son, but also to your ex and his family. I recommend doing loving-kindness meditation as this will help to ease your mind, allowing you to be better able to support your son. With respect to your ex and his family, people are like mirrors and will, on a deep level, reflect what you present to them... So present love to everyone involved. :) You had a child with your ex, so obviously you two had things in common and were in union at one point in time. It may be very difficult, but it is important to recognize that just as you found Dharma because you seek happiness, so too does he seek happiness. He may not know where to find happiness, so with your heart and mind point the way. Embrace the spiritual connection you have with him as a result of your former union and child as an opportunity to share Buddha's love and wisdom with someone who is deeply troubled. This good will helps to ensure that beneficial results come for you and your son, too.

Sorry for rambling.

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family, as well as your ex and his family, that all may learn from these experiences and ultimately find their way to Dharma, peace, lasting happiness and the experience of unconditional love, that no harm may come to any involved and that their process of growth may be gentle but firm, and timely.

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Re: My son's safety

Postby Madeliaette » Sat Dec 10, 2011 5:15 pm

Thank you also, Asabandha. I have worked through my own hatred over the past 2 decades until that has gone, and cultivated forgiveness til I am able to forgive, and I am now at the point where although I do not trust my ex's family/ex at all and do not wish to go anywhere near to them, if there was a way to help them - from a distance - I would try to do so.

I have used these recent happenings to learn and grow rather than fade and fail - perhaps, as you say, working on loving-kindness may be all I can now do whilst my son sorts himself out. He has left their area, but is now fearful for his own future worrying they may reenter his life. I find it much easier to pick up other beings' emotions than give out my own, but it is something I realize I need to work on. I have already tried to work on visualizations in that respect for my son, but perhaps I should also try towards the other people involved, as you suggest.

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Re: My son's safety

Postby kirtu » Sun Dec 11, 2011 7:47 pm

May your son be well, happy and peaceful. May no harm come to him. May he always meet with success. May he also be blessed with the determination and wisdom to overcome the inevitable difficulties of life. May all the Buddhas and Bodhisattvas shower their blessings, power, protection and love on him. May he quickly become a vessel of wisdom and spiritual activity for the benefit and happiness of all beings.

Kirt's Tibetan Translation Notes

"Only you can make your mind beautiful."
HH Chetsang Rinpoche

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Re: My son's safety

Postby Madeliaette » Sat Dec 17, 2011 7:20 am

Thank you Kirtu... at least I know he is currently in a safe place.

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