Nosta wrote:3) One of the things that makes me most sad about buddhism is the fealings and attitude toward women. And if i get to the conclusion that women are like demons, in buddhism eyes, i will abandon buddhism. Why? Because i cannot accept a religion that speakd on equality and compassion and then sees women as garbage. In fact, i get sad everytime i think on the episode of Buddha life, where he denied his teachings to women, until he was convinced to teach them...a real Buddha would never have the need to be convinced. He is a Buddha afterall!
I don't think you need to abandon buddhism. You just need to abandon those few things. Here's why we are taught to contemplate on teachings and only accept them if they seem right and makes sense. Because not all the teachings we hear 2500 years after Buddha are necessarily even originally from the Buddha. Personally at least I'm quite doubtful each and every word of scriptures would have stayed original.
If a single teachings seems to oppose the main idea of buddhism (especially if it seems harmful for beings), then just skip that single teaching.
Either it simply isn't original word of the Buddha, or it just needs some more explanations to understand correctly. Or of course, Buddha might just not be omniscient and compassionate (but I doubt that).
I'm sure women aren't demons on Buddha's eyes, or maybe are but then men are too. We both genders are having a lot of mental poisons (unless we practise, and through practise we all can get over them).
Anyway... I don't see reason to believe that Buddha would have thought of women as garbage. Why would Buddha think that of any single being, anyway? He's got the limitless compassion toward all beings and wishes to free everyone from suffering, even just tiny flies and worms, and horrible people like rapists and murderers... Doesn't Buddha see them all as ignorant beings who are just creating suffering to themselves? And wish to help them all equally?
Rebirth as a woman can often be less fortunate one (my opinion), just for some simple reasons... Those are... Because on many many cultures women has less freedom and in general more causes of suffering than men (globally things like... forced marriages, rapes, suffering and dying on pregnancy and childbirth, being under control of husband/father/someone, etc etc)... I think for that reason it can be said that rebirth as a woman is (generally; doesn't apply so much in modern rich countries) lower than as a man.
It has nothing to do with intelligence or capacity to achieve enlightenment, but with the amount of suffering.
And as buddhists, our goal is to free all beings from suffering. So, if rebirth as a woman is lower than as man, then certainly we will all need to try and live on a way that helps to reduce those sufferings... Other way of acting is certainly against compassion.
Beings in pureland probably aren't so gendercentered, that they would even think of their gender. I suppose they are pretty much occupied in gathering merit and wisdom to reach enlightenment. So for that reason, whatever the gender doesn't matter anything. But it's just my opinion, I might be wrong.