Hi Cytosine, welcome to Dharma Wheel
I hope you'll find some support and assistance here. For what it's worth, it seems that a lot of people are in situations similar to yours. But having some online support from fellow practitioners can help, and we're always interested in hearing about your experiences and challenges.
Please have a look around and explore. There are people here who at various levels in Buddhist study and practice, so it's a nice mix of practitioners. And please feel free to ask questions as they come to mind.