It was sarcasm / irony
Anyway...maybe now I say something I should not say
When I asked a shamaness about cleaning my karma
she did it and I on the same day met a woman of which I've always dreamed
She is not similar to that of which I dreamed
she is EXACTLY the same.
prior to purification of karma,by year
I wondered what it's like to fall in love?
I thought it was just the kind of attachment
combined with sexual desire.
when I purify karma
on the same day I found out what it's like to be in love.
meaby I found real Dakini?
Now it turns out that my woman from dreams
on whichI waited half my life immersed in depression and anxiety disorders
has serious health problems and I can only watch.
This really helping her,she dont need my knowledge about Atman or Anatman.
She dont care about "who experiences Bardo if I/sel did not exist".
She is still human and she need health here and now,becasue he has a 3 years old child.
Her child is also sick and cant read about Four Noble Truths.
(even though it knew how,It is a child and wants to have fun,no study dharma)
I will very gladly resign from the enlightenment
if in exchange she will recover.