The punny thread

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The punny thread

Postby Ogyen » Tue Nov 16, 2010 5:48 am

Don't join dangerous cults: practice safe sects.
:rolling:

What do two love bugs have: insects.
-found in a bottle cap.
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"To love. To be loved. To never forget your own insignificance. To never get used to the unspeakable violence and the vulgar disparity of life around you. To seek joy in the saddest places. To pursue beauty to its lair. To never simplify what is complicated or complicate what is simple. To respect strength, never power. Above all, to watch. To try and understand. To never look away. And never, never, to forget." –Arundhati Roy
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Re: The punny thread

Postby Ogyen » Sun Nov 21, 2010 1:50 am

Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in Australia.
--Charles M. Schulz (1922-2000)
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The Heart Drive Word Press
Mud to Lotus

"To love. To be loved. To never forget your own insignificance. To never get used to the unspeakable violence and the vulgar disparity of life around you. To seek joy in the saddest places. To pursue beauty to its lair. To never simplify what is complicated or complicate what is simple. To respect strength, never power. Above all, to watch. To try and understand. To never look away. And never, never, to forget." –Arundhati Roy
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Re: The punny thread

Postby Ogyen » Sun Nov 21, 2010 2:00 am

“Young horses need a stable environment where they are free to foal up and be reined in before they come to serious harm.”
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The Heart Drive Word Press
Mud to Lotus

"To love. To be loved. To never forget your own insignificance. To never get used to the unspeakable violence and the vulgar disparity of life around you. To seek joy in the saddest places. To pursue beauty to its lair. To never simplify what is complicated or complicate what is simple. To respect strength, never power. Above all, to watch. To try and understand. To never look away. And never, never, to forget." –Arundhati Roy
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Re: The punny thread

Postby Ogyen » Sun Nov 21, 2010 2:20 am

Cane sugar can't be beet.
:stirthepot:
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The Heart Drive Word Press
Mud to Lotus

"To love. To be loved. To never forget your own insignificance. To never get used to the unspeakable violence and the vulgar disparity of life around you. To seek joy in the saddest places. To pursue beauty to its lair. To never simplify what is complicated or complicate what is simple. To respect strength, never power. Above all, to watch. To try and understand. To never look away. And never, never, to forget." –Arundhati Roy
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Re: The punny thread

Postby Luke » Mon Nov 29, 2010 3:33 pm

Hi Ogyen. I just wrote one. Does this qualify?

Master-baking can be serf-abuse.
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Re: The punny thread

Postby catmoon » Tue Nov 30, 2010 12:19 pm

There once was a sad fellow who decided to end it all by swimming out to sea and never coming back. He made his way to the beach where he saw dolphins leaping and playing in the waves. The dolphins, sensing something was not right, came in to shore and asked him why he looked so sad. He told them a long tale of loss, pain, and loneliness.

"Well", they said, "Obviously you need to be a dolphin like us. We are very special dolphins. We live forever, we are never sad, and we have fun playing in the surf every day."

"How can I ever be a dolphin?" The sad man asked. "It's just not possible."

"Ah, but it is possible", the dolphins said, "And not that difficult either. But you'll have to bring us some stuff."

"Like what?" he asked.

"Well, for starters we'll need some dead seagulls. If you wander the beach a while, you are sure to find some."

The man pondered this a moment, and thought "What the hell, I'll give it a shot." And went seeking dead seagulls. And indeed, just as the dolphins had told him, dead seagulls were not all that difficult to find. Having found several, he headed back to beach where he had spoken with the dolphins. Along the way, the path became narrow, steep and rocky. And there, ahead on the path, blocking it completely, he saw a sleeping lion. Unwilling to risk being late, he gingerly stepped over the lion, which did not wake. He had gone only a few steps further when he met a policeman coming the other way, who immediately arrested him.

Now the question is, what was the charge?
Sergeant Schultz knew everything there was to know.
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Re: The punny thread

Postby catmoon » Wed Dec 01, 2010 10:59 am

Transporting gulls across a staid lion for immortal porpoises. :)
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