Hi Mark, and welcome to Dhamma Wheel
living in the 'West', I have not had so many of the negative experiences you seem to have had. (Of course, I've not lived in Thailand, although have heard 'mixed reviews' of the state of monasticism there, some better than others - but all just hearsay, and thus should be taken with a grain of salt). Even so, as the years have rolled by, I dig more and more into the Pali Tipitaka as my guide and refuge, more than any external instutition, and I simply use, in a respectful way, any means possible that will further my understanding of it, whether that be visiting a monastery to offer dana and ask a question, go online here or on 'access to insight', or consult a book. Somehow or other, a very powerful and liberating message has been passed down to us, and I increasingly believe that in essence, the suttas are the words of a fully awakened being, and have a special quality that is unmatched. What I am lately realizing is that it was many generations of monks who passed them down to us,
and so I must express gratitude to them, also.
Hope you can find the Dhamma that liberates,
the real dhamma that unburdens
the heart, rather than the sad experiences you seem to have had so far