what is the best way to deal with anxiety and fear in public

General discussion, particularly exploring the Dharma in the modern world.
Post Reply
KonchokZoepa
Posts: 1358
Joined: Tue Sep 10, 2013 9:50 pm

what is the best way to deal with anxiety and fear in public

Post by KonchokZoepa »

yes. what is the best way to deal with anxiety and fear in public when you experience fear and aversion and anxiety in body and mind and you get disturbing reflections in your mind through deluded perception.

eheh. i guess the easy way to answer is that ''practice the Dharma''

but im looking for specific approaches and mind practices.

thankyou.
If the thought of demons
Never rises in your mind,
You need not fear the demon hosts around you.
It is most important to tame your mind within....

In so far as the Ultimate, or the true nature of being is concerned,
there are neither buddhas or demons.
He who frees himself from fear and hope, evil and virtue,
will realize the insubstantial and groundless nature of confusion.
Samsara will then appear as the mahamudra itself….

-Milarepa

OMMANIPADMEHUNG

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ls6P9tOYmdo
User avatar
Johnny Dangerous
Global Moderator
Posts: 17089
Joined: Fri Nov 02, 2012 10:58 pm
Location: Olympia WA
Contact:

Re: what is the best way to deal with anxiety and fear in pu

Post by Johnny Dangerous »

KonchokZoepa wrote:yes. what is the best way to deal with anxiety and fear in public when you experience fear and aversion and anxiety in body and mind and you get disturbing reflections in your mind through deluded perception.

eheh. i guess the easy way to answer is that ''practice the Dharma''

but im looking for specific approaches and mind practices.

thankyou.
Do you mean agoraphobia, social phobia type things, or something else?
Meditate upon Bodhicitta when afflicted by disease

Meditate upon Bodhicitta when sad

Meditate upon Bodhicitta when suffering occurs

Meditate upon Bodhicitta when you are scared

-Khunu Lama
KonchokZoepa
Posts: 1358
Joined: Tue Sep 10, 2013 9:50 pm

Re: what is the best way to deal with anxiety and fear in pu

Post by KonchokZoepa »

lol, well some of the symptons but its not like a panic attack.

i dont see it as a phobia. i just fear certain people that ive categorized into stereotype kinda thing. so if i feel a little bit of aversion or fear about certain person how he looks how he dresses my delusions go rampant.
If the thought of demons
Never rises in your mind,
You need not fear the demon hosts around you.
It is most important to tame your mind within....

In so far as the Ultimate, or the true nature of being is concerned,
there are neither buddhas or demons.
He who frees himself from fear and hope, evil and virtue,
will realize the insubstantial and groundless nature of confusion.
Samsara will then appear as the mahamudra itself….

-Milarepa

OMMANIPADMEHUNG

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ls6P9tOYmdo
User avatar
Johnny Dangerous
Global Moderator
Posts: 17089
Joined: Fri Nov 02, 2012 10:58 pm
Location: Olympia WA
Contact:

Re: what is the best way to deal with anxiety and fear in pu

Post by Johnny Dangerous »

KonchokZoepa wrote:lol, well some of the symptons but its not like a panic attack.

i dont see it as a phobia. i just fear certain people that ive categorized into stereotype kinda thing. so if i feel a little bit of aversion or fear about certain person how he looks how he dresses my delusions go rampant.

That's just part of being human, just check yourself when you do it. Sometimes it's helpful to realize that other people probably do the exact same thing when they see you.
Meditate upon Bodhicitta when afflicted by disease

Meditate upon Bodhicitta when sad

Meditate upon Bodhicitta when suffering occurs

Meditate upon Bodhicitta when you are scared

-Khunu Lama
KonchokZoepa
Posts: 1358
Joined: Tue Sep 10, 2013 9:50 pm

Re: what is the best way to deal with anxiety and fear in pu

Post by KonchokZoepa »

but i dont look scary :D
If the thought of demons
Never rises in your mind,
You need not fear the demon hosts around you.
It is most important to tame your mind within....

In so far as the Ultimate, or the true nature of being is concerned,
there are neither buddhas or demons.
He who frees himself from fear and hope, evil and virtue,
will realize the insubstantial and groundless nature of confusion.
Samsara will then appear as the mahamudra itself….

-Milarepa

OMMANIPADMEHUNG

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ls6P9tOYmdo
User avatar
Johnny Dangerous
Global Moderator
Posts: 17089
Joined: Fri Nov 02, 2012 10:58 pm
Location: Olympia WA
Contact:

Re: what is the best way to deal with anxiety and fear in pu

Post by Johnny Dangerous »

KonchokZoepa wrote:but i dont look scary :D

Not to you. :D
Meditate upon Bodhicitta when afflicted by disease

Meditate upon Bodhicitta when sad

Meditate upon Bodhicitta when suffering occurs

Meditate upon Bodhicitta when you are scared

-Khunu Lama
disjointed
Posts: 217
Joined: Sat Sep 28, 2013 1:26 am

Re: what is the best way to deal with anxiety and fear in pu

Post by disjointed »

Contemplate the irrationality of your fears. Destroy the irrational fear's basis by checking it for inconsistencies.
For example, you are afraid of X, but other people are not afraid of X, so your fear must be irrational.

Deal with the automatic adrenaline response you've trained yourself to produce in X situation with a sedative.
Continue to use the sedative sparingly when panic attacks arise only.
When you have completely dealt with the irrational fears by recognizing them as such, stop using the sedative and let yourself go into a panic attack.
Label the panic attack as just an irrational bodily response and disregard it as a physical quirk of your body borne out of habituation.

Given repeated exposure to X with positive outcomes the habituation will be overcome.
If you relapse, repeat.
Do not become reliant or over use sedatives or you will end up in a new problem on top of your old.
If there is a radical inconsistency between your statements and the position you claim to hold,
you are a sock puppet.
Make as many accounts as you want; people can identify your deception with this test.
KonchokZoepa
Posts: 1358
Joined: Tue Sep 10, 2013 9:50 pm

Re: what is the best way to deal with anxiety and fear in pu

Post by KonchokZoepa »

interesting and good answer, but im a bit unsure about the sedatives.
If the thought of demons
Never rises in your mind,
You need not fear the demon hosts around you.
It is most important to tame your mind within....

In so far as the Ultimate, or the true nature of being is concerned,
there are neither buddhas or demons.
He who frees himself from fear and hope, evil and virtue,
will realize the insubstantial and groundless nature of confusion.
Samsara will then appear as the mahamudra itself….

-Milarepa

OMMANIPADMEHUNG

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ls6P9tOYmdo
User avatar
明安 Myoan
Former staff member
Posts: 2855
Joined: Thu Feb 09, 2012 7:11 am
Location: Portland, OR

Re: what is the best way to deal with anxiety and fear in pu

Post by 明安 Myoan »

I have a strong habit of putting up a front around other people.
It's cold, formal, to the point, and "get me the eff out of this interaction as fast as possible."
It's also very habitual because I usually only realize what I've done after the fact.

A few things have been helpful.
Mindfulness of the body for one. People tend to carry tenseness and aversion in certain parts of the body. For me, I suck in my gut and my breathing gets a lot shallower. Maybe you cross your arms. Maybe your neck gets tight. Relaxing these specific tensions helps a lot, in and of itself.
Remembering that this person will also get sick, grow old, and die. What's more, they likely have not come to terms with any of it and will suffer greatly when it happens. That can get yourself out of a "me and my anxiety" mindset into a more relational one. You have this suffering human condition in common.
I read something on I think the Zen International forum about how meeting someone is meeting a totally unique and dynamic manifestation of the entire universe. Everything from the physical bodies to the mental climate to the circumstances of the meeting are results of myriad mostly unknown conditions. It's a cause for wonder and curiosity, if you can remember to look closely enough.

I'm not sure if any of that is helpful, but it's gotten me to at least treat strangers more graciously, and not always go into interactions with a GITTIR DONE approach :tongue:
Namu Amida Butsu
disjointed
Posts: 217
Joined: Sat Sep 28, 2013 1:26 am

Re: what is the best way to deal with anxiety and fear in pu

Post by disjointed »

duckfiasco wrote:I have a strong habit of putting up a front around other people.
It's cold, formal, to the point, and "get me the eff out of this interaction as fast as possible."
It's also very habitual because I usually only realize what I've done after the fact.
I wear this kind of mask also.
I try to reserve it only for troublesome people I have nothing useful to offer now.
Once I had a relatively close friendship with someone who was suicidal and because I was afraid to be open and friendly with them I wasn't able to fulfill my obligations towards them as a mahayana practitioner.
They committed suicide not much later and I think if I had not been so cold and reserved they might have reconsidered.
If there is a radical inconsistency between your statements and the position you claim to hold,
you are a sock puppet.
Make as many accounts as you want; people can identify your deception with this test.
zangskar
Posts: 160
Joined: Thu Jun 23, 2011 9:05 pm

Re: what is the best way to deal with anxiety and fear in pu

Post by zangskar »

KonchokZoepa wrote:yes. what is the best way to deal with anxiety and fear in public when you experience fear and aversion and anxiety in body and mind and you get disturbing reflections in your mind through deluded perception.
Sometimes it can also be cool to just enjoy your symptoms. After all a bit of adrenaline is probably not life threatening, and compared to a 'normal', more sedated state of mind, actually could have some benefits? E.g. heightened state of awareness, mindfulness, concentration, etc.
Best wishes
Lars
Post Reply

Return to “Dharma in Everyday Life”