Life-Release induced anxiety?

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Life-Release induced anxiety?

Postby MaitriYNOD » Sun Jun 09, 2013 2:34 am

Hello everyone

Earlier today I decided to buy and release some feeder crickets from my local pet store in honor of the last day of Saga Dawa. I took them to a close-by wooded area with some redwood duff and ivy, which I read are good conditions for crickets. Towards the end of the practice, I started to feel very anxious without any clue as to why. It's been about 30 minutes and I still have an objectless panic feeling that I can't discern. Is it possible that this is some kind of karmic effect of doing the life release wrong somehow?

Any feedback and speculation is appreciated.
I am a lustful, angry dullard with no power of realization. Do not put anything I say into practice without first confirming it with a qualified teacher.
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Re: Life-Release induced anxiety?

Postby tingdzin » Sun Jun 09, 2013 3:53 am

Just speculation ,but I doubt it had anything to do with the cricket release. My thought is that your unconscious mind was picking something up from your surroundings while you were in the woods; maybe there was a predator or snake nearby, or the surroundings reminded you of something in your forgotten past, or you had ignored a "No Trespassing" sign. I don't think you can release a few crickets wrongly, provided that they are native to the habitat you released them in, and they weren't carrying a disease.
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Re: Life-Release induced anxiety?

Postby MaitriYNOD » Sun Jun 09, 2013 5:20 am

I did as much research as I could before hand. This wasn't my first cricket release and this hasn't happened before. I know crickets live in Santa Cruz (I'm listening to some chirp right now) but I couldn't figure out the exact species of the feeder crickets. I have no idea how to tell if they were diseased. I figured I would err on the side of benefiting beings, thinking that even if they died quickly in the while that beats wasting away in a plastic box or being fed right to a lizard, and this way they might form a connection to Chenrezig. But the animal real is so complex and brutal, I'm still second guessing as to whether or not I did something right.
I am a lustful, angry dullard with no power of realization. Do not put anything I say into practice without first confirming it with a qualified teacher.
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Re: Life-Release induced anxiety?

Postby lobster » Sun Jun 09, 2013 7:07 am

Anything is possible. Do some mantra for the crickets and all beings suffering for or from release . . . :sage:
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Re: Life-Release induced anxiety?

Postby Sherab Dorje » Sun Jun 09, 2013 7:20 am

MaitriYNOD wrote:Hello everyone

Earlier today I decided to buy and release some feeder crickets from my local pet store in honor of the last day of Saga Dawa. I took them to a close-by wooded area with some redwood duff and ivy, which I read are good conditions for crickets. Towards the end of the practice, I started to feel very anxious without any clue as to why. It's been about 30 minutes and I still have an objectless panic feeling that I can't discern. Is it possible that this is some kind of karmic effect of doing the life release wrong somehow?

Any feedback and speculation is appreciated.
I think that you just need to sit with the feeling and observe its nature. I do believe you will find that there is nothing there to be concerned about.

If you feel that you made some sort of mistake during the practice, then do a mala of 100 syllable Vajrasattva mantra (or the shorter mantra depending on which you have transmission for) in order to purify any errors. That's the standard procedure.
"When one is not in accord with the true view
Meditation and conduct become delusion,
One will not attain the real result
One will be like a blind man who has no eyes."
Naropa - Summary of the View from The Eight Doha Treasures
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