I can see why, but I also don't think it's a "scandal" if they do.tobes wrote:
I'm not denying the reality of power relationships, nor defending some conception of equality. Sexual attraction can often be about power and authority in many other contexts, and that can be okay -
It is not that uncommon that teachers and students hook up and have a wholesome relationship - be it sexual, marital or otherwise.
That's fine if they wait until their institutional conditions change (i.e. the semester ends). If they want to get to know each other outside of the dynamic of authority/no authority, and they do so, and it works: wonderful. The point is that both parties are stepping out of the context where they have particular ethical obligations beyond themselves, and beyond their desires.
It's not fine if it happens during the semester.
Surely you can see why.
Surely I do not have to explain why it is problematic for a prof to shag one of his students whilst the classes are still running?
Surely there is a non-puritanical reason why this would violate every university ethics code, and be grounds for dismissal?
Sometimes people just come together.
Regarding sleeping with others wives etc.
You know, that kindof thing is usually indicative of a deeper relationship problem in the marriage,
something is not being satisfied in the marriage.
I have a family member who is a naturally polyamourous person, , a monogamous relationship just doesn't truly satisfy them.
They're in a marriage with a person who believes strongly in monogamy, that one person is all the other should need to be satisfied. And maybe for them, that is true, but it isn't for their partner. And the other person doesn't understand that.
As you might expect it has created a great deal of tension in their marriage. Even though they both love and care for each other and have had a child, the sexual orientation of one of them is still Poly.
This kindof thing is more common than you might think.
I have a great deal of compassion for people in these kindof situations, and I don't think that people's marriage problems go away just because they are a Zen Buddhist or Zen Priest.
They are ordinary human beings just like the rest of us.
In Gassho,
Sara H.