Johnny Dangerous wrote:Thanks for listening all..i'll try to add some more to keep it interesting:
I don't think this is necessarily any kind of sign of 'advancing' beyond just clarity in my own head, there is alot of "bandwidth" to being a Buddhist, and this is just the frequency i'm working at right now. It's flattering to think it indicates some level of progress, but it may not be anything special. Once I get to know the teacher at the center I attend a little better, I am going to ask him about it. It could also be easy for me to get too focused on this awesome imagery and go down the wrong path. This is by far the most intense stuff i've experienced in meditation and is so different from what I felt when doing Zen that I am not entirely sure what to make of it.
A different way I could put this is that lately when I have strong feelings (but especially when meditating intentionally and following them) there is a kind of "ego mask" that is attached to feeling in particular (as opposed to external phenomenon, mental processes etc), it's sort of like a snapshot of the ego construct at a given time, some are kind of predictable- for instance the one when i'm horny and full of lust has a big, mischievous, wolf like grin as you'd expect! One that seems to be related to sadness has the sense of being childlike and alone. A really scary one that is akin to a sort of self-hatred howls and jabbers like a madman. Like I said, most are "me" as much as impermanent projections or anything else may be, but a couple have been..deep down, and unfamiliar to me for lack of a better word, and when I found these the best way I can describe the feeling was like having a splinter plucked out once they faded away.
A good trick for this is to move your awareness to your whole body, and relax, then move your attention to the feeling of relaxation in your body. Stay there until the intensity lessens.the intensity is the part that is distracting.
ghost01 wrote:Ah, most imagery, feelings, thoughts and emotions have that effect, they distract you and it always feels 'productive', they draw you in that way, if you let go of them they will generally cease pretty quickly, always return to your object, or in the advice of the article I linked return to general awareness.
Anything that's fascinating in meditation is usually a trap, but by all means experiment and come to that conclusion yourself.A good trick for this is to move your awareness to your whole body, and relax, then move your attention to the feeling of relaxation in your body. Stay there until the intensity lessens.the intensity is the part that is distracting.
Right, I get this sort of technique, just not sure when to do this all the time, or at what point it's unproductive to focus on whatever i'm focusing on. In some cases i've felt like a weight was lifted off my shoulders by focusing and following a given thing, as well as genuine insight from it. Whereas i'm sure in others I should be returning to the breath and moving on, and might even be 'fetishizing' the object i'm focusing on a bit.
Johnny Dangerous wrote:Bit of an abstract thing, just throwing it out there for comment:
When doing insight meditation alot of times I can find the "root" of an emotion or sensation, and see the layers of it, most of it plays out sort of visually for me. Sometimes with severe emotions like anger and fear I can see a sort of "ego projection" - basically a false "I" that is attached to, and interacts with whatever i'm experiencing at the time. A couple of times I have spent a long time following an emotion or sensation, and the ego projection I found was not me! Of course I know there is really no such thing as me anyway, what I mean is the ego projection I "see" is not identifiable or familiar to me.
Does anyone have similar experiences, or opinions on the subject?
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