How to disrupt any Buddhist conversation:

[viniketa]

For every cat, there is an equal an opposite watermelon.

Fifth law of thermodynamics.

[safron]

That is really cute

[safron]

[/quote]


This is another cute animal

The comment is not cute

[catmoon]

BeeGee has put up a post full of dead links.

I didn't find anything on elk sexing but I did find this:

http://lazyyogi.org/post/30409845171/the-intellectual-runs-away-afraid-of-drowning

[catmoon]

BTW the real story behind the cat picture is weirder than you can imagine.

Field biologists working for the Rocky Mountain Elk Foundation were doing a population census last fall when a mishap occurred. A biologist forgot to warm his hands before determining the sex of an elk, which as it turned out, happened to be a 1400-pound bull in full rut. This minor error resulted in the destruction of several campsites nearby as well as the biologist in question. Now, back at the biologist's camp there was a cooler that had this watermelon in it. The cooler was knocked over by the rampaging elk and the watermelon rolled into a neighbouring campsite. There, a young mother was nursing her infant child, which was struck by the watermelon and fell to the ground and colicked. Sort of a meloncolicked baby, really.

Now things get a little complicated. Among the other campsites destroyed were one belonging to the CEO of a major toilet company who had a passion for knitting and had come to the wilds to practice his obsession privately, where the shareholders and paparazzi could not find him. His small trailer was of course equipped with the very latest digital, internet-enabled, low volume pissoir and he was happily seated on this when the elk overturned the trailer. The trailer rolled over several times, finally halting at the base of the hill by a lake and the poor fellow found himself with his head jammed into the bowl, slowly drowning in his own, uh, product. The toilet that is.

Meanwhile, on a hill overlooking this debacle, help was on the way. An aging lama who was in retreat in a high cave had come out to fill his water bucket and saw the whole thing. He barrelled down the hill followed by his cat, who knew that he had never got anything right before and would probably need help again. (The cat was in fact the manifestation of a bodhisattva guiding the lama along the path, and for the purpose had taken the form of a Manx cat. The cat in the picture is not a Manx, but that's another tail entirely.)

The lama first came upon the trailer and hearing muffled sounds of distress entered to find a rather well dressed fellow with his head stuck in the toilet. With lightning perspicacity the lama immmediately deduced that he had interrupted a tsok offering in progress, and headed straight back up the hill to get his butter lamps and offering bowls.

The cat however was not so easily taken in by appearances, and realized the man was in distress. Seeing the watermelon floating in the lake and being well acquainted with the explosive properties of watermelons (http://puntodigital.com/surprise-in-china-due-to-explosive-watermelons/224729/). He retrieved the watermelon, rolled it under the trailer, poked it with a well placed claw and BOOM! The shockwave drove the man's head from the toilet, splattered his suit in watermelon bits, and drove his head into the cieling with painful force. He immediatedly started complaining to the cat about the mess and the bump on his head, which I suppose just goes to show you some people can't resist a good watermelon whine.

[viniketa]

Thank you for the really great story, catmoon!! I've not had a sustained, rolling belly-busting laugh for awhile until this...

[futerko]

BTW the real story behind the cat picture is weirder than you can imagine.

Interesting use of the term "real" - cue the madhyamaka analysis...

[catmoon]

Poetic license. Or licentiousness. Or something.

[pueraeternus]

The cat was in fact the manifestation of a bodhisattva guiding the lama along the path, and for the purpose had taken the form of a Manx cat. The cat in the picture is not a Manx, but that's another tail entirely.

Gasp! It must be Avalokittyshvara!

Sadhu Sadhu!

[dharmagoat]

It must be Avalokittyshvara!

[Blue Garuda]

BTW the real story behind the cat picture is weirder than you can imagine.

Field biologists working for the Rocky Mountain Elk Foundation were doing a population census last fall when a mishap occurred. A biologist forgot to warm his hands before determining the sex of an elk, which as it turned out, happened to be a 1400-pound bull in full rut. This minor error resulted in the destruction of several campsites nearby as well as the biologist in question. Now, back at the biologist's camp there was a cooler that had this watermelon in it. The cooler was knocked over by the rampaging elk and the watermelon rolled into a neighbouring campsite. There, a young mother was nursing her infant child, which was struck by the watermelon and fell to the ground and colicked. Sort of a meloncolicked baby, really.

Now things get a little complicated. Among the other campsites destroyed were one belonging to the CEO of a major toilet company who had a passion for knitting and had come to the wilds to practice his obsession privately, where the shareholders and paparazzi could not find him. His small trailer was of course equipped with the very latest digital, internet-enabled, low volume pissoir and he was happily seated on this when the elk overturned the trailer. The trailer rolled over several times, finally halting at the base of the hill by a lake and the poor fellow found himself with his head jammed into the bowl, slowly drowning in his own, uh, product. The toilet that is.

Meanwhile, on a hill overlooking this debacle, help was on the way. An aging lama who was in retreat in a high cave had come out to fill his water bucket and saw the whole thing. He barrelled down the hill followed by his cat, who knew that he had never got anything right before and would probably need help again. (The cat was in fact the manifestation of a bodhisattva guiding the lama along the path, and for the purpose had taken the form of a Manx cat. The cat in the picture is not a Manx, but that's another tail entirely.)

The lama first came upon the trailer and hearing muffled sounds of distress entered to find a rather well dressed fellow with his head stuck in the toilet. With lightning perspicacity the lama immmediately deduced that he had interrupted a tsok offering in progress, and headed straight back up the hill to get his butter lamps and offering bowls.

The cat however was not so easily taken in by appearances, and realized the man was in distress. Seeing the watermelon floating in the lake and being well acquainted with the explosive properties of watermelons (http://puntodigital.com/surprise-in-china-due-to-explosive-watermelons/224729/). He retrieved the watermelon, rolled it under the trailer, poked it with a well placed claw and BOOM! The shockwave drove the man's head from the toilet, splattered his suit in watermelon bits, and drove his head into the cieling with painful force. He immediatedly started complaining to the cat about the mess and the bump on his head, which I suppose just goes to show you some people can't resist a good watermelon whine.

Brilliant.