Your very kind and insightful comments/advice have been most appreciated. I learned a lot from both this one and Retro's previous thread. I'd like to share with you my new understanding:
“If there is conflict what is the root of that?”
-- The root is the desire to spend my time on learning/understanding Dhamma and “doing” Dhamma practice (sitting/walking meditation, contemplations/reflec tions, communicating with our Dhamma friends …), instead of spending my time on worldly things which are all anicca/dukkha/anatta anyway, and which I have no interest in doing (aversion?). Or in other words, I still didn’t really take the daily activities as part of my Dhamma practice, and even worse – applied the Dhamma of anicca/dukkha/anatta/disenchantment/dispassion/let-go to them unwisely. What should be let-go is my ignorance/delusion and my liking/disliking of the worldly things, not the worldly things themselves!
The Dhamma practice is not only “doing” sitting/walking meditation and etc., but should be ”done” every moment of my conscious life. Everything I do can be used as an opportunity to watch over the mind and remove its liking/greed, disliking/aversion and delusion of “I”/”my”.
I agree that our defilements can be removed/delivered in lay life without ordain (several well-respected monks have advised me to stay as lay practitioner since they don't know a good place for nuns at this moment). But I think a more wisdom/vipasana-based approach would probably suit us better, since it’s difficult for us to spend lots of time on sitting/walking meditation without interference to attain deep jhana. I don’t know how the Buddha’s lay disciples had attained arahantship (I’d be interested in learning that). I only know that Master Huineng was enlightened as a lay practitioner, even without a teacher around him. It appears to me that he had no greed/aversion/conceit left, and he passed away in Samadhi, like the Buddha – knowing well in advance the date of his parinibbana. He had all those supernormal powers, for instance, mind reading, knowing his murders within his life time and even after his life time. His entire body has existed well for about 1300 years in very hot and humid condition without any treatment. Even though he founded another school (Southern Chan/Zen) and was not a Theravadin (it was not possible for him then), his method of practice [http://www.sinc.sunysb.edu/Clubs/buddhism/huineng/content.html] could still be considered/referenced by us. This is only my personal opinion, and I hope no attacks would be made to him if you don’t agree with me.
Metta to all,
“I am not trapped by anyone other than myself”.
“The only limbo is the limbo we create with our minds.”