Well no one can give you advice of what to do, because simply they are not you.
However all my friends tend to be big into the drugs and alcohol culture and I wanted to distance from that behavior and lifestyle, so I just distanced myself from them and started hanging out with them much less. From my experience people who are into drugs, for them just smoking marijuana is an event, something to do, and they won't do something, anything else. One thing you failed to mention is his frequency? How often does he smoke and for how long? With most my friends alcohol and drugs is all they tend to do socially, if given the chance. Even someone who only
smokes for 10-30 minutes a day, if they work full time, they are spending a large portion of their remaining free time under the influence.
Being associated with him, will entail being associated with his marijuana habit, even though you seem to have made it go underground by confronting him. Ultimately if you don't want to be associated with such activities yourself, and if he has no intention of quitting, you will have into look into a divorce. Or you could stay together, but deal with marijuana use and likely other drugs later on. You cannot force people to change, but you can control if you are in or not in their presence. But I guess on some level you may have noticed this as you write about your marriage failing in a subsequent post
. If you don't have kids with him, and are not financially dependent on him, that may be the best bet. The last point is big, because Westerners often try to underplay the financial dynamics of the family structure, in this Podcast a Marxist gives a class analysis of the American household:Richard Wolff applies his Marxian class analysis to the US household, noting that more and more adults are rejecting the traditional (feudal) model of domestic exploitation
Wolff says that in the 1970s is when wages starting falling for American workers, and when women had to start massively entering the workforce. That is also when the divorce rate started exploding, because the traditional unspoken deal of the quasi-feudal American household was that the man earns the living for the family, and in turn the woman reproduces with her surplus labor the effort to maintain and feed the rest of the household. When most men couldn't earn enough, there was no longer incentive to stay unhappily married if you had to work anyway.