As my practice deepens, I'm starting to notice all the little ways I create karma feedback loops. They're like favorite books I've read a dozen times where I know the whole story by heart, but when I pick it up, I can't stop reading until the inevitable conclusion.
It's like knowing book A is a trashy romance novel, or book B is a weird sci-fi story you don't really like, but something about their familiarity is comforting so you start reading them anyway. "Gosh, this story sucks but maybe the 12th reading will be better than the 11th."
How in the world do you short-circuit these kinds of karmic cycles? I especially think of people with addictions. We're almost never happy while we satisfy samsaric needs with more samsara, yet we do it anyway and are miserable start to finish. Or if we're lucky, we're happy for a brief moment... then miserable for far longer. Just what the hell is going on, and how do we stop it?
I've been trying lots of Green Tara, and some purification visualizations with Chenrezig, trying not to be too hard on myself for falling on my face time after time. The main effect of these practices seems to be a greater appreciation for the stupid irony of these little karma stories, but not much in the way of actually stopping them.
Thank you for your insight