Rain wrote:The third precept says not to engage in sexual misconduct, but does not define "misconduct". I have seen this explained as "don't engage in sexual conduct that would cause suffering to others" (don't commit rape, if you're married don't cheat on your spouse, etc.).
What I am not clear on is how this applies to BDSM.
With consenting people, I don't think it's a big deal. I don't think it's particularly wholesome karma because it just reinforces attachment again and again, but I don't think it's a horrible thing either. People have different things that turn them on, so doing kinky type acts for people who are into that, is not very different from two consensual partners who don't engage in bdsm but do other particular sexual actions to please each other.
All attachment has one flavour, whether it be attachment to food, sex, the smell of fresh air, or anything at all. It does arise with different degrees of intensity, though. So realize that it is just attachment, just like any other moment of attachment, try not to get too caught up in it to a degree that you get carried away, and, of course, be safe and try not to hurt anyone.
We are easily caught up in the flood of attachment.
We are also easily caught up in the flood of aversion, including aversion to being attached, doing something that reinforces attachment, or seeing or hearing about somebody that does something based on attachment. Aversion too is unwholesome. So we take the Middle Way, and understand with wisdom.