How to get rid of clinging to self

General discussion, particularly exploring the Dharma in the modern world.
Red Faced Buddha
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How to get rid of clinging to self

Post by Red Faced Buddha »

One of the major hindrances to me is my constant clinging to "I."this has caused me some trouble and makes me rather blind in certain doctrines.How can I get rid of my constant clinging to self?
A person once asked me why I would want to stop rebirth. "It sounds pretty cool. Being able to come back. Who wouldn't want to be reborn."
I replied. "Wanting to be reborn is like wanting to stay in a jail cell, when you have the chance to go free and experience the whole wide world. Does a convict, on being freed from his shabby, constricting, little cell, suddenly say "I really want to go back to jail and be put in a cell. It sounds pretty cool. Being able to come back. Who wouldn't want that?"
Jnana
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Re: How to get rid of clinging to self

Post by Jnana »

The same way you get to Carnegie Hall: practice, practice, practice.
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futerko
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Re: How to get rid of clinging to self

Post by futerko »

Think about what happens when you identify with something, for example when you say I am this or that, you are excluding the other possibilities and anchoring yourself to something partial rather than remaining open to the whole.
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pueraeternus
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Re: How to get rid of clinging to self

Post by pueraeternus »

Reciting and contemplation of the Heart Sutra is often a very efficient practice for piercing ego, among other things. In East Asia, due to its relative short length, practitioners would memorize it and recite it continuously.
"Men must want to do things out of their own innermost drives. People, not commercial organizations or chains of command, are what make great civilizations work. Every civilization depends upon the quality of the individuals it produces. If you over-organize humans, over-legalize them, suppress their urge to greatness - they cannot work and their civilization collapses."
- A letter to CHOAM, attributed to the Preacher
muni
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Re: How to get rid of clinging to self

Post by muni »

To know that we all are perfect nature already and there is a temporary misperception (duality) can be encouraging.

There is no wrong one, but mispercieving suffering.
May no suffer be.

Yes, Jnana, practice, thank you.

:namaste:
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Astus
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Re: How to get rid of clinging to self

Post by Astus »

The Buddha's basic remedy is the contemplation on the five aggregates and the 6-12-18 sensory fields. To see that whatever you call the I must be an aggregate, and all aggregates bear the three characteristics (impermanent, suffering, selfless) results in comprehending and even realising that there is no such thing as an I.
1 Myriad dharmas are only mind.
Mind is unobtainable.
What is there to seek?

2 If the Buddha-Nature is seen,
there will be no seeing of a nature in any thing.

3 Neither cultivation nor seated meditation —
this is the pure Chan of Tathagata.

4 With sudden enlightenment to Tathagata Chan,
the six paramitas and myriad means
are complete within that essence.


1 Huangbo, T2012Ap381c1 2 Nirvana Sutra, T374p521b3; tr. Yamamoto 3 Mazu, X1321p3b23; tr. J. Jia 4 Yongjia, T2014p395c14; tr. from "The Sword of Wisdom"
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Johnny Dangerous
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Re: How to get rid of clinging to self

Post by Johnny Dangerous »

Two things that help me some, old hat for many i'm sure.

First I just ask "who am I", and name five things that define me, then follow these five things to their conclusion, and I see there is no "I" found in them, whatever I name will only be relationships to something else.

Sometimes when meditating I focus on physical pain I am feeling (don't know why pain is easier than anything else), and try to inquire into the pain and follow it to it's root...if/when i've been successful I can sort of "see" that the pain is not a thing but the working of the aggregates.
Meditate upon Bodhicitta when afflicted by disease

Meditate upon Bodhicitta when sad

Meditate upon Bodhicitta when suffering occurs

Meditate upon Bodhicitta when you are scared

-Khunu Lama
greentara
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Re: How to get rid of clinging to self

Post by greentara »

Johny Dangerous, Who am I?... is the ultimate question. It is stated in many different ways that the focus should be the origin of the I and to literally follow the thoughts back to their source and abide there right at that point of origin. Nisargadatta also points to this placeless place as just prior to the rise of the thought. Others even say I is the first name of God and holding the "I" can be a mantra which reminds one strongly of the diamond cutter sutra...a honing of all thoughts down to just the first principle. All that said, the point is the origin and directing the attention there as it wanders again and again. I really don't think there is one specific method for everyone. Don't all stances go in the end?
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seeker242
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Re: How to get rid of clinging to self

Post by seeker242 »

Insight meditation practice I would think. :smile:
One should not kill any living being, nor cause it to be killed, nor should one incite any other to kill. Do never injure any being, whether strong or weak, in this entire universe!
floating_abu
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Re: How to get rid of clinging to self

Post by floating_abu »

Jnana wrote:The same way you get to Carnegie Hall: practice, practice, practice.
Second vote.

Persistence, inquiry and doubt.
Red Faced Buddha
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Re: How to get rid of clinging to self

Post by Red Faced Buddha »

How exactly is the concept of I an illusion?I can understand that there is no self set in stone but there is still technically a being called Red Faced Buddha.My major problem is my fear of impermanence and anatman.
A person once asked me why I would want to stop rebirth. "It sounds pretty cool. Being able to come back. Who wouldn't want to be reborn."
I replied. "Wanting to be reborn is like wanting to stay in a jail cell, when you have the chance to go free and experience the whole wide world. Does a convict, on being freed from his shabby, constricting, little cell, suddenly say "I really want to go back to jail and be put in a cell. It sounds pretty cool. Being able to come back. Who wouldn't want that?"
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futerko
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Re: How to get rid of clinging to self

Post by futerko »

Red Faced Buddha wrote:How exactly is the concept of I an illusion?I can understand that there is no self set in stone but there is still technically a being called Red Faced Buddha.My major problem is my fear of impermanence and anatman.
Just to clarify, are you asking about personal identity here, or about the ontological status of awareness?
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明安 Myoan
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Re: How to get rid of clinging to self

Post by 明安 Myoan »

Red Faced Buddha wrote:How exactly is the concept of I an illusion?I can understand that there is no self set in stone but there is still technically a being called Red Faced Buddha.My major problem is my fear of impermanence and anatman.
Well, what is a being then? What is YOUR being? Follow the question to its most absurd lengths. The point isn't to prove some nihilist brainteaser "none of us really exists!"

Where you may arrive though is the apparent realization of nothing seeming to exist independently with clear-cut borders, nothing seeming to have a man behind the curtain calling the shots. And yet here you are. Paradoxes are good at stopping our minds, especially when we have a sense that it's not a paradox at all. Welcome to the absurdity of our normal views! :D Our natural state seems supremely bizarre if you look too close :P
Namu Amida Butsu
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Queequeg
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Re: How to get rid of clinging to self

Post by Queequeg »

Johnny Dangerous wrote:"who am I"
The Eternal Question...

From one of the greatest movies of all time (IMHO)

http://youtu.be/THRB4bv1-mw
There is no suffering to be severed. Ignorance and klesas are indivisible from bodhi. There is no cause of suffering to be abandoned. Since extremes and the false are the Middle and genuine, there is no path to be practiced. Samsara is nirvana. No severance achieved. No suffering nor its cause. No path, no end. There is no transcendent realm; there is only the one true aspect. There is nothing separate from the true aspect.
-Guanding, Perfect and Sudden Contemplation,
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Queequeg
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Re: How to get rid of clinging to self

Post by Queequeg »

duckfiasco wrote:
Red Faced Buddha wrote:How exactly is the concept of I an illusion?I can understand that there is no self set in stone but there is still technically a being called Red Faced Buddha.My major problem is my fear of impermanence and anatman.
Well, what is a being then? What is YOUR being? Follow the question to its most absurd lengths. The point isn't to prove some nihilist brainteaser "none of us really exists!"

Where you may arrive though is the apparent realization of nothing seeming to exist independently with clear-cut borders, nothing seeming to have a man behind the curtain calling the shots. And yet here you are. Paradoxes are good at stopping our minds, especially when we have a sense that it's not a paradox at all. Welcome to the absurdity of our normal views! :D Our natural state seems supremely bizarre if you look too close :P
:good:
There is no suffering to be severed. Ignorance and klesas are indivisible from bodhi. There is no cause of suffering to be abandoned. Since extremes and the false are the Middle and genuine, there is no path to be practiced. Samsara is nirvana. No severance achieved. No suffering nor its cause. No path, no end. There is no transcendent realm; there is only the one true aspect. There is nothing separate from the true aspect.
-Guanding, Perfect and Sudden Contemplation,
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Johnny Dangerous
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Re: How to get rid of clinging to self

Post by Johnny Dangerous »

Just thinking about this, not to long ago I read A Profound Mind by HHDL.

The bits of emptiness/not self are especially good, and really gave me an understanding I did not have before, in pretty clear language. Something to work with in meditation made clearer.

I hate to do something as banal as recommending a book, but maybe it's worth it.

If you are able to successfully pall apart "I" and see that really there is no such thing, you can also do it outside of "I" with anything, and eventually see that "I" is just a set pf dependencies...
Meditate upon Bodhicitta when afflicted by disease

Meditate upon Bodhicitta when sad

Meditate upon Bodhicitta when suffering occurs

Meditate upon Bodhicitta when you are scared

-Khunu Lama
floating_abu
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Re: How to get rid of clinging to self

Post by floating_abu »

Red Faced Buddha wrote:How exactly is the concept of I an illusion?I can understand that there is no self set in stone but there is still technically a being called Red Faced Buddha.My major problem is my fear of impermanence and anatman.
These questions are common for a beginner.

Practice furthers. Practice can give you answers that no-one on a forum can adequately give.

When you know, then as the Buddha said, it is like tasting the fruit for yourself. Would you want anything less?

Best wishes,

Abu
floating_abu
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Re: How to get rid of clinging to self

Post by floating_abu »

Johnny Dangerous wrote:Just thinking about this, not to long ago I read A Profound Mind by HHDL.

The bits of emptiness/not self are especially good, and really gave me an understanding I did not have before, in pretty clear language. Something to work with in meditation made clearer.

I hate to do something as banal as recommending a book, but maybe it's worth it.

If you are able to successfully pall apart "I" and see that really there is no such thing, you can also do it outside of "I" with anything, and eventually see that "I" is just a set pf dependencies...
If it's an 'understanding', it will never be good enough.

Metta,

Abu
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KathyLauren
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Re: How to get rid of clinging to self

Post by KathyLauren »

The Noble Eightfold Path.

Getting rid of clinging to self is what the Dharma is all about.

Om mani padme hum
Keith
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Re: How to get rid of clinging to self

Post by Admin_PC »

Doing some intro to Mahamudra meditation today...
One of the practices was an exercise on expanding your consciousness, out of the body, infinitely all around, as if an expanding sphere of awareness.
Have hit moments in meditation before, but today was pretty poignant.
I started getting almost a panic attack - felt like i had to keep breathing, had to keep my heart breathing.
Realized that maybe this was the clinging to self at a very basic level.
I still have things i need to do in this life, like taking care of my kid(s), etc.
Will keep practicing, but don't know if that lesson will be absorbed until some of my responsibilities are not so immediate.
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