I understand what you are saying, having been there myself.
A wise man once said that 'love is the mother of misery' - and I think its true that you are experiencing this for yourself.
Continue with your practice and don't let it go and remain mindful of those uncomfortable dhammas as they rise and fall.
There is also some asubha (contemplation of unattractiveness) practices but I wouldn't recommend those unless you were under the guidance of a teacher.
Wishing you all the very best,
“No lists of things to be done. The day providential to itself. The hour. There is no later. This is later. All things of grace and beauty such that one holds them to one's heart have a common provenance in pain. Their birth in grief and ashes.”
- Cormac McCarthy, The Road
Learn this from the waters:
in mountain clefts and chasms,
loud gush the streamlets,
but great rivers flow silently.
- Sutta Nipata 3.725
(Buddhist aid in Myanmar) • •
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