Hi,
I think you could benefit from Mindfulness = Calming Meditation = Shamata meditation.
The very beginning of this practice, would seem to help or fix your problem.
I have put some parts in bold, that I think describe your problems and it's remedy.
There is a lot more, than I have posted here, at this web site.
The
Table of Contents follows.
Type of Meditation.....................................Stages of Meditation
Calming Meditation = Shamata..........................Introduction
..........................................................................Lesson 1 - Placing the Mind
..........................................................................Lesson 2 - Keeping Focus
..........................................................................Lesson 3 - Dealing with Dullness
..........................................................................Lesson 4 - The Controlled Mind
..........................................................................Lesson 5 - Dealing with Agitation
..........................................................................Lesson 6 - The Pacified Mind
..........................................................................Lesson 7 - Single-Pointed Focus
..........................................................................Lesson 8 - A Balanced Mind
..........................................................................Lesson 9 - Complete Achievement of Shamata
..........................................................................Lesson 10 - After Shamata?
Contemplation and Placement Meditation...........Contemplation and Placement Meditation
..........................................................................The Importance of Ritual & the Dangers of Routine
Vipashyana Meditation........................................An Introduction to Tibetan Buddhist Vipashyana Meditation
*** Please pay special attention to, the practice with a candle flame. Use the electric kind to avoid the risk of a fire.
Place it in front of you and focus on the tip of it. ***
The following, parts of a text, come from the Mindfulness or Calming Meditation or Shamata article.
By - LarryReside, at http://www.PeacefulGarden.ca
Shamata is sometimes called either Mindfulness Meditation or Calming Meditation. It is called Mindfulness Meditation because mindfulness is the main part of the technique. It is called Calming Meditation because calmness is one of the main results. SHAMATA actually means complete concentration. The obstacles to complete concentration are also the same things that prevent us from being calm or from seeing ourselves and the world around us clearly
The 9 Stages of Shamata
Shamata meditation is first about training the mind to focus on a single task without getting distracted, and then we learn how to use that focus to observe and understand our own mind. It eliminates the shotgun reaction or the tendency to react completely automatically to what we're experiencing.
There are 9 Stages leading to the full attainment of Shamata where we have complete concentration with no effort and the physical and mental bliss from having a better understanding and more control of our body and minds. The stages are traversed upwards & downwards based on:
1) The length of time between meditation sessions. We are trying to develop focus, awareness, and peacefulness. We are not used to experiencing these things and so we are like someone trying to learn to play tennis for the first time. Therefore we need to imitate a professional player and practice playing until we get good at it. In the same way, we are not really meditating at first, but are imitating real meditators. That's why it's called meditation practice. We need to practice doing it over and over again until we get good at it. Just like practicing the piano, the larger the gaps of time between practice sessions, the longer we will have to work through the lower levels to get to the higher stages of meditation.
2) Our energy level or health during meditation sessions. If our energy level is low or we are sick or fighting sickness, then achieving our usual meditation levels and staying there may be more difficult.
3)
Our level and strength of agitation or dullness currently present in daily life. If our life is particularly stressful or if we are going through a particularly intense period, our agitation may be stronger, or dullness may be strong from being tired or from focusing very hard on our problems and their feelings. This will make meditation more difficult and less effective (especially in the beginning). This high agitation or extreme dullness will make our advances slower. At this point it is better to have many small meditation sessions than to try to meditate for long periods of time. Extra rest, a change of scenery, physical exercise, and good nutrition will help alleviate these difficulties.
4) Our ability at each time to catch agitation and dullness. How careful we are during meditation to catch agitation or dullness while they are happening, will vary the speed and intensity of our advancing through the stages. Progress will be slower if we are more lax or are too intense, and will be faster if we are watching more diligently but calmly. We may not have much say in the matter, especially until our awareness of how our mind works increases. However, if we wish to advance quickly to the higher stages, we must be diligent in catching agitation and dullness and maintaining a balanced level of alertness and relaxation.
The stage that is considered our current level is the stage that we spend most of our time in during our meditation session. If we practice regularly, we will go through the stages back to this current level quickly. After that, we will have moments of going one or two levels past our current one (maybe even more) and that becomes the incentive for continuing practice. However, we must not grasp at these attainments, trying to re-create them. The stages must be experienced freshly and naturally. Attempts to regenerate stages only strengthens the separation between our "normal" state and our new meditative state. Experiencing the stages must occur naturally, organically and unforced (and they will).
We can try to practice this meditation for 10 minutes once a day.
Some people may not be able to meditate for even 10 minutes. There are some people who can't even sit still for 1 minute, let alone 10. This is not very good. These people are wound up like a tight spring, which is not healthy. Eventually the spring could snap and completely unravel. If you look at a wind-up toy or an old clock, you can see how this works. If there is the right amount of tension then the clock works. Too little tension and it doesn't work; too much tension and its completely broken and will not work properly again. If you start by putting in too much tension, the clock will not work properly right from the beginning.
For these type of people, it would help to just sit and count out-breaths until they reach 21. If they can do that regularly for a period of time, then they should try counting their outbreaths from 1 to 10 for 3 cycles. They can then gradually work from 1 minute of meditation to 5 minutes and then gradually get to 10 minutes. They may also try going for a relaxing walk first and then meditate - or try to meditate by a lake or out in nature or in a place that they find particularly calming.
Once we practice this way regularly, we try increasing each time to 15 minutes, returning to 10 minutes when we are short on time or energy. The effects are cumulative, so it is important to try to meditate regularly. Short regular sessions are far more valuable than long sessions followed by long gaps between meditation sessions. It is important not to strain too much in meditation. We should always ensure that we create an atmosphere where we feel meditation is helpful and that we make it enjoyable enough to increase our desire to return to it.
We should always return to a lower time when busy or too agitated or tired. We can eventually increase the length of time for our meditations or increase the frequency to twice each day. The best period of time for meditating is during transition periods between one activity and the next. (Between showering and breakfast, or between finishing work and starting supper, or just before bedtime, or at lunch break). For myself, my best times turn out to be just after breakfast and before I start the rest of my day, and at about 2:30 in the morning when I wake up in the middle of the night.
It can be amazing how difficult it can become to find even 10 minutes to do meditation and it can be amazing how many excuses we can find not to meditate. It is important for each of us to find, usually by trial and error, our own best transition time to use for practice. Then we need to try hard to stick to that time, but we shouldn't beat ourselves up too badly when we have problems. When we DO have problems we merely need to look at what happened and see if it was really avoidable or not and then try again.
Meditation takes more effort than people realize but it should be a practice that we look forward to and so we need to make sure that we don't force ourselves too much or practice too hard or for too long a time.
Lesson 1
Placing the Mind
In the first two stages of Shamata meditation, the metaphor of the Monkey, Rabbit, and Elephant is often used to describe our minds. In this example the mind is described as strong & powerful (the elephant) but smashing around, rough and lumbering because it is jumping from one thing to another (the rabbit (sense consciousness)) and it is going in any direction at the slightest whim and toying with, evaluating, and commenting on everything (the monkey (discursive thought)).
First, we tame the rabbit by reducing the amount of distractions and maintaining a certain environment and posture.
The first step in taming the rabbit is to set up a conducive environment. We need to find a clean, quiet place, without clutter and neatly arranged, where we can practice. There should be very little in the room or practice area and we could set out reminders of our spiritual practice including pictures, statues, books, offering substances (incense, food, candles, etc). The cleanliness and simple decorations are to reduce the visual distractions. if we do happen to get distracted, having objects of spiritual importance in the room will help remind us of our practice.
The quietness of the space removes the tendency of the mind to chase after sounds. Any sound that we do hear should be regarded as part of the background in the same way as the visual objects that decorate the room should be considered background. It is good at first try to practice in the same place as much as possible. This helps to reinforce our positive mind states and energize our practices. With time, just entering the room can bring us into a calm meditative state.
Another way that we control the rabbit is to keep our gaze slightly downward, just off the end of our nose. We focus in a general way and not at any particular point. If we are the type of person that tends to be very agitated or restless, it may help to close our eyes completely at first. If we tend to be very dull and sleepy, it may help to open the eyes more fully and look straight ahead. In the case of dullness, it may help to meditate outside sometimes, while looking at the sky. For someone who is agitated, short meditation sessions just after a quiet walk might be helpful at first.
The purpose of incense is to control our tendency to be distracted by smells. The incense should not be too sweet or too pungent, but pleasant and as neutral a smell as possible.
For the sense of taste, we place our tongue lightly on our upper palette, just behind the teeth. This allows the mouth to stay moist but without excess saliva. Also, in this position, excess saliva is quickly eliminated.
In terms of the sense of touch and body awareness, we sit and hold ourselves in a certain position. If we stood, we would have a tendency to want to move somewhere. If we lay down, we would have a tendency to sleep. That is why sitting is the usual posture.
Some teachers insist on a strict sitting posture, but I feel that there may be some situations where strict posture is not possible, especially in the west, where we are not used to sitting cross-legged at all. Certain yoga exercises can be done to help achieve the perfect posture, but for some people, it may not be possible at all. Some people with severe back or neck problems may need a chair or even need to meditate lying down. There is also a walking meditation that is practiced in Zen or Chan monasteries as a break between sitting meditation sessions.
The best position is known as the full lotus position, which has the legs crossed with the feet on the opposite thigh. We can also just sit cross-legged. The hands should be either right hand cupped in the left with thumbs touching, or palms down on or near the knees. The back should be as straight as possible. We should feel solid, secure and comfortable and we should try to keep awareness of our bodily position and our level of relaxation and tension. In this position, all of our energy flows in a circle towards our chi center, just one hand width below the navel.
The above position is designed to strengthen our energy and promote concentration. As soon as we move away from this position, we move away from this solidity and focus.
Some meditators can be seen with their hands open, with palms up and thumb touching their third finger. This is a position of being open to the world. The thumb touches the third finger to help prevent negative energy from entering their psychic channels from the outside. This type of position is not used in Buddhism (despite what you may see on TV), but can be used to work on our interaction with outside forces. Because we are trying to gain control of our minds and improve our focus, we keep the hands in a circular position at our navel or flat on our thighs.
For those who can't sit with their legs in full lotus, they can use 1/2 lotus, or Burmese position where the legs don't cross. They can also sit cross legged. In Zen Buddhism, they usually kneel with their palms resting on their thighs just above the knees. This is also a very stable and firm position, but requires a lot of strength in the knees and legs. In all of these cases, having your rear-end high helps stabilize the position and make it easier on the legs and joints.
For many of us in the west, because of lack of familiarity or practice or because of age, we can't sit cross legged, and so, we may need to use a chair. It can be more comfortable, when using a chair to keep our palms face down just above our knees. If we do use a chair, then our feet should remain flat, in order to keep as much solidity as possible in this position.
To make sure we are in a comfortable position, we can do the following exercise. Starting at the top of the head, we think of relaxing that part of the body. We work our way slowly down to our neck, shoulders, arms, hands, torso, hips, legs and feet; relaxing each part. At first this can take several minutes, but with practice this can take only a few seconds. This helps to make sure our back is straight and our position is comfortable.
We calm the monkey by focusing on the out-breath and watching for agitation and dullness.
We need to learn to calm down the monkey mind and to teach the monkey when to act and when not to act. We need to learn to ignore the monkey's constant chattering, when he's not helping us, until he settles down. We need to provide space for our minds, just like giving a large, safe pasture to a wild horse. Though the horse runs all through the pasture at first, eventually he will settle down and begin grazing calmly.
To begin calming the monkey and giving our mind this sense of space as well as working on the distractions of the mind, we begin by focusing our mind on our breathing.
Focusing on our breathing and watching our bodily sensations for tension or poor posture, or watching our mind for agitation and dullness are all ways to give the monkey-mind something to do that will actually help us out. With practice, we will train the monkey to stop chattering away all of the time and work with alertness to help us bring our attention back to the breathing and keep us alert and relaxed at the same time.
In other types of practices, we can use Mantras, or certain concepts and ideas as meditation objects to focus on. The Practice of reciting Mantras also helps to cut through our Monkey-minds and their discursiveness. The Mantras also have meaning, and, if we know the meaning of the mantra, repetition can help instill the meaning into our minds. For example, with the Mantra Om Shanti, Shanti means "patience" or "peace". So repeating "Om Shanti" is like telling ourselves over and over again - "peace, peace, peace" or "patience, patience, patience".
We can also focus on a candle light or a white light which can be used to instill clarity in the mind. If we wish to open up and be less closed in mentally and physically, we can look at the sky or something blue. If we wish to be calm, we can look at the grass or something green, or watch the even rhythm and fluidity of water and the waves in a lake or ocean.
If our minds are very active, tends to multitask, and is easily distracted, we can choose an image of the Buddha or some other peaceful image. First we would look at a picture of this image for a few moments and then attempt to visualize the image in our own minds. Then we would focus on trying to maintain that visualized image in front of us while we hold the meditation posture. Gradually over time, we would try to improve the clarity and detail of our visualization.
There is also focusing on an object to gain insight into it's qualities. This is similar to scientists watching animals in an attempt to gain understanding. There is also focusing on certain problems looking for a solution, or focusing on certain concepts such as "What is Compassion, and why should I practice it?" in an effort to apply the resulting understanding to our lives. Though this is often called meditation, it really is more of a contemplation. It uses the concentration and the mind control developed during meditation in order to investigate, observe our reactions, and stay on topic. This is still an important activity to engage in, especially in terms of spiritual development, but it is not really meditation per se.
Meditation is a science of the mind. Just as a concert pianist becomes skilled on the piano, a skilled meditator becomes capable of creatively working with their own minds and the resulting effects in the world around them.
The reasons why breathing is chosen in Shamata is because we always carry it with us, it is both internal and external, it is both impermanent and continuous, and it is connected to the body energy and the thought process. We try to unite the mind with our breath and just observe the operation of our body and mind and their reactions to our environment.
We focus on the cool sensation at our nostrils as we breath in, we feel our abdomen expand (breathing from the abdomen is supposed to be healthier and more calming than breathing from the chest). We then focus on the warm sensation of our out-breath at our nostrils as our abdomen retracts.
In the beginning, it may help to count our out-breaths to help us cut through discursiveness and better gauge our alertness. At the first out-breath, we count 1. At the next out-breath, we count 2. We do this until we reach 10, then return to 1 and start over. Each time we lose count, or go over 10, we return to 1. Each time that we find we have been distracted from the breathing, we return to 1 again. This helps us to maintain focus.
We try to just observe our thoughts and feelings etc. as they arise and pass away. We don't dwell on them, but we don't try to chase them away. We constantly return our focus to our breathing and the stillness and quiet around us, when we've discovered that we've strayed. We observe our thoughts and feelings as if we were a biologist watching animals coming and going from a watering-hole. We note them, but we do not react to them. We don't try to analyze them, but we look at them as if they are part of the background.
It is important to keep our attention like the strings on a guitar, neither too loose or too tight. The main obstacles to concentration are agitation and dullness and these must be counteracted with memory and alertness. If agitation, restlessness or tension sets in, then we loosen our concentration and relax our posture and try to release, or let go of, our tension. If dullness, sleepiness, or slouching sets in, then we tighten up our attention and straighten our posture.
Forceful attention which is usually called Squeezing attention is needed to maintain concentration on the breath in the beginning stages. Mental wanderings (gross agitation) are the main obstacles or areas to work on in the beginning of our practice.
The 1st Stage - Placing the Mind
This stage is the result of hearing about meditation and learning the instructions. If we can meditate for 30 seconds without wandering, then we have completed this stage.
Once we have begun a regular practice, it can help to get a good feel for the possible results and benefits of meditation by doing a meditation retreat in which we designate a day or several days where we meditate many times over the course of each day. Again, it helps to start slowly and not take on too much too soon. Meditation retreats can involve 4 to 6 sessions per day, of 1/2 or 1 hour each, (with a 5 or 10 minute break at the 1/2 hour), involving meditations interspersed with lectures, prayers, contemplations, or studies.
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There are eye exercises and relaxation exercises, on the web, but in keeping the topic on Tibetan Buddhism this seems a good suggestion for you to try.
I hope it is of benefit to you.
