Obstacles! Help or advice appreciated.

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Re: Obstacles! Help or advice appreciated.

Postby Kaji » Tue Sep 25, 2012 7:52 am

Dave The Seeker wrote:There's been some good advice here.

I wouldn't suggest giving up your practice. Buddhism is working on ourselves to be able to help others. The changes that happen to us are the things that others see more than we do. At least for the most part.
There's no point pushing your belief onto others nor them to do to you. Can you see where I'm coming from?

Being a good son, husband and father are, for the most part, things you've made the decision to do.
Follow through with these decisions with compassion and love.
Be the loving husband and father as well as the person your children want to be like.
Your path will help you to become better at doing these things. Keep working on yourself and things will get much better. :namaste:

Hope your search for a job ends soon.

I definitely won't give up my practice. My main forms of practice currently are recitation of the Casket Seal Dharani when I have a quiet period of time with myself, e.g. when tending to my baby daughter alone, when driving by myself. Other times I try to contemplate Amitabha Buddha whenever I can and remember to, e.g. when eating, walking, doing housework, etc., just before falling asleep, after waking up (this one is really helpful for Pure Land purpose).

When not seen by others in the family (other than my baby girl), I may chant dharani and Amitabha's name using the vajra method - mouth closed, move tongue only without making audible noise. When in the presence of other family members, I use the yoga method - chanting with my mind only.
Namas triya-dhvikānāṃ sarva tathāgatānām!
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Re: Obstacles! Help or advice appreciated.

Postby Kaji » Tue Sep 25, 2012 7:57 am

Queequeg wrote:If I may suggest a course of action - take what you have learned from your Buddhist study and practice and apply it now - it seems you already are doing this. Take this as an opportunity to test truth of the Buddhadharma you've learned, as well as an opportunity to deepen your understanding of Buddhadharma - don't forget that living your life according to Buddhadharma, even if you are not obviously putting it to practice, is still practice. Patience, forebearance, equanimity, kindness, compassion, etc. all these things can be practiced in the midst of your situation without having to announce or even acknowledge to yourself that you are practicing Buddhadharma. Look at this as an opportunity to face your karma, understand it, own it, and overcome it. It sounds like this situation is bringing your own reflection into relief. Keep with it. Don't shy away from it. This is something people spend years sitting on the mat to see.

Don't wast this opportunity! Turn this obstacle into an opportunity to develop your wisdom!

Thanks. Yes, this is exactly what I am trying to do.

Funny, this apparent episode of karmic obstacles is letting me see that I am very much surrounded by many Bodhisattva.
:namaste:
Namas triya-dhvikānāṃ sarva tathāgatānām!
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Re: Obstacles! Help or advice appreciated.

Postby Kaji » Tue Sep 25, 2012 8:12 am

Kunga Lhadzom wrote:If they really loved you,
they would let you be yourself & accept you as you are.
Real love is selfless.
Immature love is selfish .

I think a typical person can only exercise real, unconditional love to a limited extent. My parents love me very much, but it would be unacceptable and heartbreaking for them if I become a monk for example. Whether my wife loves me selflessly or not, she still needs a husband with whom she can live and raise a child together.

Could they love me even more to the point where they could let me be myself? Possibly, but right now they cannot. Nor could I force them to. To demand they exercise real, unconditional and selfless love for me would be a most selfish request.

Having taken the Bodhisattva path, there is no way I will abandon them. My quest to free all people, starting with those closest to me, i.e., my family, can only be accomplished one step at a time - I understand that now. It might take many years, perhaps way past my body's expiry date, but that's OK. If I stay true to my path I will be get there.
Namas triya-dhvikānāṃ sarva tathāgatānām!
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Re: Obstacles! Help or advice appreciated.

Postby Kaji » Tue Sep 25, 2012 8:14 am

viniketa wrote:It seems you are confusing your "self" with your actions. Try finding who is "self", first, then try changing actions.

:namaste:

What do you mean by "self"? Self as in what we describe in everyday usage of the word in English, or the Buddhist definition?
Namas triya-dhvikānāṃ sarva tathāgatānām!
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