How to overcome attachment to our partners?

Discuss your personal experience with the Dharma here. How has it enriched your life? What challenges does it present?

Re: How to overcome attachment to our partners?

Postby mudra » Wed Mar 30, 2011 1:04 am

muni wrote:Ram:
"Any effort was always unsuccessful. Later the reason Ifound was that effort makes the Ego. And increased ego creates side problems."


Identification: my feelings, my emotions, my bubble of the ocean. Then no compassion but passion.

I think identification is a very important point - we think 'my feelings' etc, but we also identify with these kleshas: "This is me".
So it becomes even harder to let go.
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Re: How to overcome attachment to our partners?

Postby ground » Thu Mar 31, 2011 3:17 am

Adamantine wrote:
TMingyur wrote:I cannot follow your logic either. Nevermind.

Kind regards

I've reflected on it some more and I do understand your points. I think the differences we've expressed are merely because we are discussing something on the level of relative, subjective, illusory experience-- and neither of us can really know what that experience is like coming into the world- - from the point of conception through actual birth. Unless, of course, we have intact memories of it. I don't and I assume most people don't. So we may both be correct, as different beings may experience birth in different ways, according to their karma. Some may feel terribly alone, some may feel greatly cared for and encompassed by others. I am assuming we are discussing the subjective experience of 'alone' and not the larger ontological status of self and other.

Strange. Now in that you are writing "Some may feel terribly alone, some may feel greatly cared for and encompassed by others." it seems you are defining the topic as that which I have explicitly excluded above:
TMingyur wrote:Please note "being alone" it appears that this is sometimes mentally confused with "feeling alone" which is not the topic here.

But I am not referring to any "ontological" status either. Ontology is completely incompatible with dharma from my perspective. Since the aggregates cannot leave their own sphere there is always some sort of "isolation" which I am referring to as "being alone" (not "feeling alone"). Of course in a sense when saying "isolation" this is inconsistent because "isolation from what?" actually cannot be answered, so the term "alone" appears more appropriate.

Kind regards
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Re: How to overcome attachment to our partners?

Postby wangsa » Wed May 25, 2011 3:00 am

Why ?? What is wrong with your partners ??
When they are here, embrace and love it, when they gone, let it go !!
Don't trouble yourself with the idea of overcoming attachment, there is nothing wrong with your partners either
I think the more you try to go deep finding the answer, the deeper you are swimming with the questions, before you know it you will find yourself asking another questions , and hmmm I think have to becareful with logic as well because logic is the one who keeps creating endless questions no !!
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