People phasing out of conversation

Discuss your personal experience with the Dharma here. How has it enriched your life? What challenges does it present?

Re: People phasing out of conversation

Postby Shemmy » Fri Feb 07, 2014 8:36 pm

Looks like I was phasing out on this conversation till just now…


but, it is a favorite topic of mine so I thought I'd chime in. Ding! Ding!


(the chiming represents my agreement that people are phasing out of conversations a lot imho…)

The following is probably mean and nasty over-generalizing but I'm going to overgeneralize anyway: I think it is not only the compulsive playing with iphones, it is the media byte/text message culture as well. People now demand you communicate anything and everything in 5 words or less. Otherwise, sorry sir, your time has expired. Going the other way, too many people seem to think they can send you short cryptic notes as tho it were a link you can click to do a full download of the necessary details straight from their brain. The lucky to have great meaningful full employment are over commited and have been for years, those of us who wanted a normal life are not keeping up with the program are out of the loop in loop land, neither are going to be engaged/engaging very much.


People comment on certain more general interest websites , your posts are tooo loooong! I tell them I feel too many people's posts are far too short, they fail to communicate a point. But as people have commented above, too many people are bored by what people are saying and bored in saying anything themselves.

Dharma Wheel is an exception of course.
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Re: People phasing out of conversation

Postby Roland » Mon Feb 10, 2014 8:07 am

I get that people get bored with what people are sometimes talking at them. I get caught in that boredom myself in certain situations... some people are incredible long winded, presenting a monologue narrative of each moment of their day. I can understand, also, people phasing out when I start nerding hard, talking about complex science or something like that. That's when I just stop talking and realize why they drifted off - that totally makes sense.

What I'm mainly referring to is when I talk about the logistics of some thing or event, or something that needs to be completed, or something that isn't just day to day life "stuff". When someone's attention is so scattered, so fragmented, in the most severe cases. But I think this is all connected (isn't everything?...). The scattered attention, the constant checking of technology, the boredom... these are dull states of mind or subconscious escape mechanisms. When you constantly feel the need to check a phone when someone is talking to you because you are bored, you are trying to escape your current experience of reality instead of being with what is arising in it (that really boring thing that person is talking about).

But I'm someone who never gets bored. I'm completely fascinated by just about everything. I can't help myself. Even the rare chance I get bored with someone talking at me about how they were turning right at a red light, and they weren't paying much attention and wouldn't ya know it! I almost hit someone on a mountain bike! How about that! So then I turned right and drove down the road and saw this person from high schoo....... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Then I think... well isn't that interesting? I got bored. Even that fascinates me.
"Seek truth in meditation, not moldy books. Look in the sky to find the moon, not in the pond."
- Persian proverb
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Re: People phasing out of conversation

Postby Roland » Fri Apr 11, 2014 5:06 pm

"Seek truth in meditation, not moldy books. Look in the sky to find the moon, not in the pond."
- Persian proverb
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Re: People phasing out of conversation

Postby Gwenn Dana » Fri Apr 11, 2014 5:18 pm

I guess if we were never phasing out we wouldn't need Buddha's (or any other Guru's) teachings :shrug:
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Re: People phasing out of conversation

Postby Roland » Fri Apr 11, 2014 6:28 pm

Good point. :thumbsup:
"Seek truth in meditation, not moldy books. Look in the sky to find the moon, not in the pond."
- Persian proverb
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Re: People phasing out of conversation

Postby garudha » Fri Apr 11, 2014 8:10 pm

I've never used a computer or watched the internet. I have a direct line with god despite not having a car phone. I don't have a pager but make use of carrier pigeons. I walk everywhere, eat raw grass and brew my own pee into a refreshing beverage. You're welcome to join me for a drink and we'd have a grand time like in the good old days.

Regarding the OP; I note that people are mainly interested in themselves.
~ "The requested topic does not exist" ~
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Re: People phasing out of conversation

Postby Adi » Fri Apr 11, 2014 8:21 pm

Roland wrote:Does anyone else experience this?


Apparently this was one of Eve's first complaints.

Ambrose Bierce put it wonderfully in The Devil's Dictionary:

CONVERSATION, n. A fair to the display of the minor mental commodities, each exhibitor being too intent upon the arrangement of his own wares to observe those of his neighbor.


In my experience, recent technology has only made more apparent what was already going on, perhaps making it appear that distraction happens faster and involves small screens instead of birds, breasts or wild hairs.

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Re: People phasing out of conversation

Postby Adi » Fri Apr 11, 2014 8:26 pm

garudha wrote:I've never used a computer or watched the internet. I have a direct line with god despite not having a car phone. I don't have a pager but make use of carrier pigeons. I walk everywhere, eat raw grass and brew my own pee into a refreshing beverage. You're welcome to join me for a drink and we'd have a grand time like in the good old days.


You remind me a lot of my great Aunt Tilly. I always enjoyed her company and conversation but felt it best and prudent to politely decline the tea.

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