I'm feeling all the hurt in the world.

Discuss your personal experience with the Dharma here. How has it enriched your life? What challenges does it present?

I'm feeling all the hurt in the world.

Postby flowerbudh » Sun Nov 03, 2013 1:52 am

My heart has sunk into my belly and I'm on the verge of tears. I want everyone to be happy and free and loved. Ouch.
Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without. - The Buddha
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Re: I'm feeling all the hurt in the world.

Postby lobster » Sun Nov 03, 2013 2:15 am

flowerbudh wrote:I want everyone to be happy and free and loved. Ouch.


Including ourselves? Yes? Why we practice? :meditate:

What produces your equanimity and calm in such a situation? :consoling:
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Re: I'm feeling all the hurt in the world.

Postby futerko » Sun Nov 03, 2013 2:16 am

awww :group:

We want you to be happy, free, and to feel loved too.
we cannot get rid of God because we still believe in grammar - Nietzsche
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Re: I'm feeling all the hurt in the world.

Postby duckfiasco » Sun Nov 03, 2013 5:13 am

I'm generally a pretty stoic guy.
But unexpected scenes or sounds of tragedy make it hard to resist tears.
Pema Chödrön calls this our soft spot.
Most people, feeling this tenderness, build up armor around it, maybe aversion or rejection or numbing themselves, anything to protect it.
She says that if we instead enter the soft spot fully, not trying to change our thoughts or emotions, but hold our pain and the pain of others' in our arms with tender concern, it's a rich opportunity for practice.
Rarely do you viscerally FEEL anothers' pain. In this moment, the self/other wall that is so often built up to shield ourselves is gone.
You can learn a lot about non-existence of this barrier, about equanimity, about compassion, about the need to save others from this samsara...
If only you stay with it :)

You may find any number of her articles here helpful: http://pemachodronfoundation.org/articles/
For example: http://shambhalasun.com/index.php?optio ... 2&Itemid=0
Please take the above post with a grain of salt.
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Re: I'm feeling all the hurt in the world.

Postby flowerbudh » Sun Nov 03, 2013 5:23 am

what is this feeling called?
Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without. - The Buddha
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Re: I'm feeling all the hurt in the world.

Postby oushi » Sun Nov 03, 2013 8:38 am

flowerbudh wrote:My heart has sunk into my belly and I'm on the verge of tears.

Don't block it, cry! Release it.
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Re: I'm feeling all the hurt in the world.

Postby lobster » Sun Nov 03, 2013 10:29 am

flowerbudh wrote:what is this feeling called?


Dukkha.
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Re: I'm feeling all the hurt in the world.

Postby Luke » Sun Nov 03, 2013 11:37 am

flowerbudh wrote:My heart has sunk into my belly and I'm on the verge of tears. I want everyone to be happy and free and loved. Ouch.

Hi Flowerbudh,

You might enjoy Tibetan Buddhist lojong meditations, such as tonglen. Lojong is all about improving the mind by meditating on compassion.
The people on here who are actively practicing Tibetan Buddhism could give you better advice than I can.

Compassion is a great thing, but try to channel it into something positive, such as meditating, reading about Buddhism, and/or helping others.

We can't change the world, but we can improve it in small ways. :)
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Re: I'm feeling all the hurt in the world.

Postby justsit » Sun Nov 03, 2013 1:51 pm

flowerbudh wrote:what is this feeling called?

Bodhicitta
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Re: I'm feeling all the hurt in the world.

Postby undefineable » Sun Nov 03, 2013 2:58 pm

Hence the Bodhisattva path. Also, see my sig..

This is a tricky subject, in as much as gender-specific child-rearing instincts clearly play such a large part, leaving weaker forms of compassion vulnerable to being substituted by unsavoury urges like resentment, as many thinkers have pointed out. For the less 'feminine', the 'soft spot' described might be a good place to start.

P.s. I'm not sure that Buddhas have any use for 'feeling loved' - Interesting :thinking:
"Removing the barrier between this and that is the only solution" {Chogyam Trungpa - "The Lion's Roar"}
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Re: I'm feeling all the hurt in the world.

Postby smcj » Sun Nov 03, 2013 6:21 pm

flowerbudh wrote:I want everyone to be happy and free and loved. Ouch.
What is this feeling called?

Without hope or faith, it becomes an existential flip-out.
Combined with hope and faith (Refuge), it becomes bodhicitta.

I hope that you can vent it in the right direction. Good luck.
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Re: I'm feeling all the hurt in the world.

Postby Johnny Dangerous » Sun Nov 03, 2013 6:58 pm

Realization of the First Noble Truth by itself is pretty depressing. I remember reading alot of Camus before getting into Buddhism lol, once you are thoroughly convinced that life is inescapably full of suffering, it's pretty hard to go in any other direction than Buddhism. For me, all the advice given here about loving-kindness mediation has been the most effective...it's very easy for me to fall into Nihilism.

There's normal suffering, then there's the renunciates suffering, that's what you're experiencing I think. It's a good thing, you are young right now, but you will hit a time in your life where the people you love start dying en masse, all kinds of experiences of disease, and various other suffering are closer to you. The sense of something wider than personal suffering can funnily enough, get you through times of great person suffering, and allow you to transform the feeling into something... spiritually productive, for lack of a better term.
"Just as a lotus does not grow out of a well-levelled soil but from the mire, in the same way the awakening mind
is not born in the hearts of disciples in whom the moisture of attachment has dried up. It grows instead in the hearts of ordinary sentient beings who possess in full the fetters of bondage." -Se Chilbu Choki Gyaltsen
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Re: I'm feeling all the hurt in the world.

Postby dude » Sun Nov 03, 2013 7:53 pm

flowerbudh wrote:My heart has sunk into my belly and I'm on the verge of tears. I want everyone to be happy and free and loved. Ouch.


It seems you and I share a connection from the distant past.
By "coincidence," I too am suffering greatly today.
Let us cry together and share the good medicine of loving kindness. We will heal each other and open the way to heal all others.
:namaste:
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Re: I'm feeling all the hurt in the world.

Postby Lindama » Sun Nov 03, 2013 8:11 pm

flowerbudh wrote:My heart has sunk into my belly and I'm on the verge of tears.


The gates are open today... a total eclipse of the sun in Scorpio on the new moon. It's a good day to hear the cries of the world.
blessings,
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Re: I'm feeling all the hurt in the world.

Postby montana » Sun Nov 03, 2013 8:18 pm

Consider how you generated that state of mind because it is very useful.

Also you should turn it into a resolve to benefit beings and dedicate it to developing the qualities of a Bodhisattva.
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Re: I'm feeling all the hurt in the world.

Postby Punya » Sun Nov 03, 2013 8:32 pm

As you've probably already found it's quite easy to find a tonglen practice by Pema Chodron with an internet search.

Generally speaking you can't take on the karma of others, but it does reduce our ego clinging which will benefit others as it takes effect. There's a further discussion about this practice by Kagyu teachers here www.kagyu.org/kagyulineage/buddhism/tra/traqa.php
Unless the inner forces of negative emotions are conquered
Strife with outer enemies will never end.
~Dilgo Khyentse Rinpoche
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Re: I'm feeling all the hurt in the world.

Postby Vasana » Mon Nov 04, 2013 5:53 pm

The only way to meet immeasurable suffering is with immeasurable compassion.

Suffering changes it's meaning and it's grasp on us many times as we progress on the path . To use even the most adverse conditions and realization of suffering as a source of courage and determination is the way.

On Bodhicitta >

"It is the supreme elixir
That overcomes the sovereignty of death.
It is the inexhaustible treasure
That eliminates poverty in the world.
It is the supreme medicine
That quells the world’s disease.
It is the tree that shelters all beings
Wandering and tired on the path of conditioned existence.
It is the universal bridge
That leads to freedom from unhappy states of birth.
It is the dawning moon of the mind
That dispels the torment of disturbing conceptions.
It is the great sun that finally removes
The misty ignorance of the world."


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Re: I'm feeling all the hurt in the world.

Postby Seishin » Mon Nov 04, 2013 7:01 pm

I am sorry to hear you feeling this way flowerbudh :hug:

Have you considered going to see a doctor? You may be suffering from depression. I am not a doctor and anything we suggest on this board should be seen as an extra to your doctors recommendations.

You are not responsible for the whole worlds suffering and you can't help everyone... right now. Even Buddhas and Bodhisattvas can't remove everyones suffering, they can only help. The best thing you can do is practice now, so you may attain enlightenment and help countless beings. Wallowing in your suffering won't help anyone.

I hope you feel better soon. :consoling:

Gassho,
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